First semester is about half way over, and you're bound to be bored. After a few weeks at school nothing can really excite you anymore, huge parties are old news, you've obviously stopped caring about tests and quizzes and you've gone from embracing the "relaxed" look to being just plain dirty. You're dangling over the black abyss that is the monotonous existence of a college kid. But wait! A hand shoots out to save you just as you're about to fall to your doom, it's me! And I have some awesome ideas on how to spice up your mind-numbing reality:
Take a Road Trip: This is totally simple. Just cram all your friends into a car and drive. I suggest New York City, I don't care how far away it is. Don't worry about bringing any money, everything is free in the Big Apple, and all the tolls can be paid with nothing more than a polite smile and a, "hey how ya doin' pal?" Not to mention gas prices, zero dollars a gallon my friend. Sometimes in New York City they pay you five dollars just to fill up! They say New York is the city that never sleeps, and they mean it! Just wander through all the dark alleys that you see, you're sure to meet all kinds of interesting people.
Punch Your Roommate: This is a sure fire way to introduce some excitement into your life. Just walk right up to him/her and sock them in the face. When they come to, just be like, "You ate every single last one of my gingerbread cookies!" They won't have any idea what you're talking about, which is the idea. Before they can explain that they didn't even know you had any gingerbread cookies give them a swift kick in the side. After you've calmed down you can explain that it was all a misunderstanding. Your roommate will understand, right?
Learn a foreign Language: Just kidding, rob a convenience store. You don't need much, just something that somewhat resembles a gun and a kick-ass attitude. Get all your friends together and go rob that damn convenience store for all the Ho Ho Snack Cakes and scratch off games it's worth. With your winnings from the scratch off games you can go buy even more Ho Ho Snack Cakes. When the cops come looking for you just try bribing them with the Snack Cakes, if they act insulted, try offering them more Snack Cakes" or threaten them with the "gun".
Go on America's Funniest Home Videos: First you'll need to get the smart kid on your floor to build a time machine so you and your friends can travel back to 1990. Once there you can send in that video of you getting hit in the crotch with a croquet mallet. You might win 10,000 dollars, or better yet, you might get to meet Bob Saget in his prime. Getting back to the future might be hard, but who cares? You met Bob Fucking Saget!
Free All the Animals From the Zoo: Not only will you be escaping the mundane existence of college life, you will be helping wild animals escape the caged existence of zoo life. Just hop on a bus to your local zoo. When you get there, sneak on in and cut the locks off all the cages. Start with the more docile animals, so as to give them a head start from the carnivorous predators you'll be releasing soon after. As for you, you shouldn't worry too much about being eaten by lion, at most they'll just maim you. And what a small price to pay for an exotic animals freedom!
So now you've got no excuse to be bored, I just supplied you with some great ways to bring some exhilaration into your bleak lives. Any one of my above suggestions will do, but don't be afraid to try your own recipe for entertainment; all you need is a good imagination, a wild streak and a complete lack of common sense and basic reasoning skills. Oh, it also helps if your parents dropped you on your head when you were a baby.