A lot of people on this website write articles about how to get girls and such. Pah! If only it were that easy. You can't just go out and "get girls" you're skipping a crucial step here people. Before we can have sex with girls we have to learn how to avoid having sex with guys. I ran into this problem a lot my first year at college, so let me help you out.

Drink Beer: I know Sour Apple Tinis are really good, but so is knowing the gentle touch of a woman. If a frat guy sees you sipping a fruity drink he's totally going to hit on you. And come on, man, be honest with yourself, after two or three daiquiris, do you have the will power to resist? By drinking beer you are proving to everyone that you are a real man. But if you need more validation try eating a raw steak and waving your dick at every girl at the party.

Don't Sleep in the Same Bed as Your Roommate: Sometimes it's really late and you don't feel like you have the energy to climb all the way to the top bunk, but no matter how tired you are you should always try to sleep in your own bed, I don't care how god damn adorable your roommate looks with his Snoopy stuffed animal tucked between his arms. I know how you feel, guy, sometimes you just wanna cuddle your roommie, which is totally normal, but you just have to stand firm in the face of temptation (or remain flaccid) and get in your own bed.

Don't Dress in Drag: It's late on Friday, you're getting ready to go out and you think to yourself, "Hey, you know what would go great with these sneakers? A dress." Don't do it dude! No matter how bangin' that dress looks on you, you're going to be getting attention from the wrong kinds of people. If you just can't stop yourself from putting on the dress, which I understand, at least go with something manly. Maybe a dress with naked chicks on it, or a dress made out of old footballs.

Stop Watching The O.C.: I'm going to be blunt, this step sucks. But you just have to do it. I'll tell you what, I'll ruin the ending for you: All the problems get resolved" . Oh, and Seth dies. I'm just saying from my own experience, you'll be all curled up on your futon watching Ryan breath heavily and Marissa not be able to act when your buddy from English class comes in to study. He sees you're watching the O.C. and he takes it as a personal invitation to take off his pants and try to spoon with you. Which was nice, Eddie, but I kind of have a thing for Summer.

Alright I think that should do it. If you follow my advice to the "T" you shouldn't have any problem not having sex with dudes. If you do run into this problem, however, fuck it! Who cares, man? This is college, we're supposed to try new things! It's not gay if it's an experiment between friends! Now, who wants to watch the O.C. with me?