The Office: The One That Went on Too Long
It started out great. You excitedly told all your friends about this great new girl you met. But things changed. Slowly at first, little annoyances you were willing to forgive because everything else about her was so great. Then one day, you noticed that special something was completely gone. She was a completely different person. Was she always this boring? This inconsistent? You pretended everything was okay, but that just made you more bitter and angry as you tried to make a broken thing work. By the time you admitted that it was over, there was more relief than sadness, and all the good parts at the beginning were forgotten.
Firefly: The Tragic End
There was so much promise. It was love at first sight, and you could easily imagine growing old with her, loving her more with every passing year. Then one day, much sooner than expected, she was gone. Tragically eaten by a fox. On lonely nights you still relive old memories and look over the same pictures you looked at a hundred times. But she's never coming back. Ever. So you should probably stop whining about it. But you won't.
SNL: Your Loving Wife of 37 Years
Yours is a relationship of comfortable routine. Once there was passion, now
Well you're glad she's with you, but you admit you don't pay attention to her as much as you should. You two have been together for a long time, and you'll continue to be together for a long time to come. You've had your ups and downs over the years: times when you hated being in the same room with her, and times when she's all you can think about. You're ashamed that you sometimes wonder who will outlive the other.
Work It: The Drunken One Night Stand
You knew it was a bad idea. Then you started drinking and thought, "How bad could it be? Maybe there's something fun here." Wrong. It was not fun in any kind of way. As you vomit on the carpet your only wish is that you can scrub your brain clean from this awful stain of a memory.