Every Tuesday resident chill-Internet-girl Marina will answer your questions about life, love, college, sex or anything else you've got on your mind. There will be GIFS.



My dad wants me to join the army/sherrif's department but I want to finish college and get my law degree. Any thoughts? Also, y'all are awesome. – Robin

It's pretty normal to have some disconnect between what your parents want for your future and your own ambitions. For example, I wanted to be a Disney channel star but my parents wanted me to be "college educated" and "not likely to drive a Porsche through a stranger's living room while on a coke binge." Your dad has spent eighteen years making the major decisions for your life, so it's probably a little scary to give up control to a complete life-running rookie. But ultimately, it is your life. So if what you really want is to be a lawyer, do it. Work your ass off and openly weep during the LSATs and buy power suits. Also, leave me your number because I'm going to need a good lawyer if the Disney thing ever pans out.

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How do you gently tell you roommate that she NEEDS TO FUCKING KEEP HER SHIT ON HER SIDE OF THE DAMN ROOM? – M.V.

I'd say you have two options:

  1. A series of passive aggressive notes that spiral into aggressive aggressive notes and eventually land you a meeting with the RA to explain why you've covered the dorm room with "Fuck you and your fucking cereal bowl" post-its.
  2. Talk to her. Unless she's some psychological mastermind, she's probably not trying to piss you off on purpose. She might not even be aware of how much she's invading your space. Don't try to scold her (no one likes feeling cornered), but let her know where your head is at. "Hey can you try to keep your things on your side a little more? Sorry, stuff like that really stresses me out."

BOOM! Angry confrontation avoided! People skills achieved!

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What… is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow? – Greg

YES, WE'VE ALL SEEN MONTY PYTHON.






What do you do if you like a girl, but can't remember her name? It's been a few days now and I think she's starting to get suspicious. – John G

I don't think I've ever met someone and remembered their name on the first try. In the course of writing this sentence, I've already forgotten yours. Justin? Maybe Jimmy? Yeah, we're going to call you Jimmy. Listen Jimmy, you came to the right broad with a shitty memory. Assuming you've already tried all the basic tactics, here are a few tricks that usually work for me.

  1. Find a mutual friend who's name you DO know and try to connect the Facebook stalking dots until you can put a name with a face.
  2. Get a buddy and pull a tag-team name extraction. You introduce the girl to your friend Kevin (this also works with friends not named Kevin). Kevin shakes her hand and says "Hey, I'm Kevin." There's a 90% chance that she'll respond by saying "Hey, I'm so-and-so" and then you'll have her name.
  3. Have a baby with her and then sue for custody. Her name should be on a lot of the legal docs.
  4. Call her Caitlin. There are a lot of Caitlins. She's probably one.

Hope that helps, Jimmy.

Need advice? You can tweet at @marinarachael, comment below, or ask on our Tumblr. Check back next Tuesday to see if your question was answered!