The Many Deaths of Toby, the Wolverine Mascot from Red Dawn - Image 1

1. Moonwalked into a minefield.
2. Failed to give correct password to a sentry. Handler explained mascots don't speak. Handler was also shot on the spot.
3. Hilarious lewd dance performed around Captain Lee of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea Armed Forces led to much less hilarious repeated stabbings by bayonet.
4. Accidental discharge of t-shirt cannon gave away position as well as several "Wolverines Roar!" novelty shirts to North Korean troops.
5. Mascot Fight with official North Korean mascot became bloodbath after it turned out Kim Jong Un "mascot" actually real person who leads North Korea.
6. Handsprings into minefield.
7. Mascot Mission: Search For the Loudest Fan Subaru Challenge ends in abysmal failure as Toby is run over by Captain Lee's new Subaru
8. Removed protective mascot head after complaining it was impossible to see out of and "hot as balls in there" – both making mascot an easy target for snipers and completely ruining the illusion for the younger guerillas.
9. Eaten by actual wolverines released by North Korean troops.
10. Miscommunication led Toby to successfully use a trampoline to jump over enemy lines, spike a football into Captain Lee's tent and then perform a victory jiggle – football was intended to be a grenade.