Once a week, resident chill-Internet-girl Marina will have a glass of whiskey and then answer your questions about life, love, college, sex or anything else you've got on your mind. There will be GIFS.
I'm spending holidays at my bf's parents' house again and they do x-mas way more than my family does. How do I cope with all their merriment? – CM

DRINK. THE. KOOLAID. When you're on your boo's home turf, you've got to play by his family's rules. Bring a holiday sweater, get familiar with the Jackson 5 Christmas album, and politely smile as his drunk grandma places a ratty Santa hat on your head. His family's level of merriment may not be what you're used to, but it's better to play along then be the dickhead who sits pouting in the car at the Christmas tree lot because it's too cold outside. And honestly, letting yourself get swept up in the excitement of a holiday is pretty fun. You may have a festive nutjob waiting deep inside you yet.

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I'm a high school sophomore and the girl I like is a senior. I've liked her for a year now and we're kinda friends. I don't think she likes the idea of dating sophomores because her sister is one and she doesnt really wanna date anyone because shes graduating. I've tried out of sight outta mind, but it hasnt helped. I have no idea what to do – Brian L.

On the last day before summer in 5th grade, my friend Caitlin convinced me to ask out the boy I'd had a crush on all year because worst case scenario I wouldn't have to see him all summer. He said no, citing that as aforementioned, we would not see each other all freaking summer. (Though to be fair, I was also a horribly unattractive 5th grader.) Point being that throwing up a Hail Mary rarely works in the dating world. More often than not, you're just gonna get your heart pwned. Sorry for crushing your dreams.




My problem is that I prefer watching star wars to talking to real people, and thus have no friends. This would be fine except that I'm lonely. – Alex, via Tumblr

You got this. Star Wars isn't exactly an underground indie flick. There are millions of people who love that franchise and at least a couple hundred thousand like it better than they like other people. THOSE ARE YOUR PEOPLE. Find them, and talk to them about how other people suck.




I have this recurring dream involving me, pharrell, a bottle of courvoisier and a table…How do i make it happen in real life? – Anonymous, via Tumblr

You don't see people ordering Courvoisier a lot in the wild, so I'd say your best bet for fulfilling this fantasy is to quit your job become a sexy video ho. You're also going to want to figure out how to twerk. And when you do that, please teach me because it seems like something I should know how to do in case of emergency and have currently failed to master.


Need advice? You can tweet at @marinarachael, comment below, or ask on our tumblr. Check back next Tuesday to see if your question was answered!