Welcome to Roommate Confessions, the column where we share the worst stuff you've done to your roommate. If you think you can top these stories, confess your sins at the bottom of this page.

Dont Ever Live With Someone From Work - Image 3

My roommate is so messy it's disgusting. Weird smells come out of her room…I can't even describe it, its like BO and sweaty gym socks and god only knows. There are crumbs all over our kitchen constantly no matter how much I clean it. I had to put out ant traps cuz I'm sure we will get ants sooner or later. She is always dropping things into the little metal things under the coils of the stove and never cleans it out after! Hello?? That stuff is gonna just burn later….when I'm cooking…. She has never once cleaned a thing in our apartment…ever. But I repay her for that because after I clean the bathroom I dry off all the surfaces with her face towel and then hang it back on the hook so she will use it to dry her face the next morning. I also put a few drops of pickle juice in her half gone gallon of milk so she thought it spoiled and threw it out….and I've done this a few times…love seeing her waste money. On an unrelated note….she contributed next to nothing to our apartment. Well that's gonna bite her in the ass when I tell her I'm not renewing our lease and then she will be stuck with an apartment with nothing in it except her bed, a couch, and a frying pan. Whoops, guess she just won't have a roommate but will be stuck here for her job ….or she can go back home and live with her parents. HA! Oh yea, and bitch has GOT to learn to chew with her mouth closed. No one wants to see half-eaten food rolling around in your mouth. DISGUSTING! Not to mention this girl is perpetually single. She has a gross face with no chin (how weird is that?). Not sure if she has ever dated anyone but she is so socially awkward I wouldn't be surprised if she is 24 and still a virgin. I wish I could say all this to her face, or just be a complete bitch to her…but we work together…so I am forced to be courteous and nice. Lesson learned here: don't ever live with someone you only know from work…chances are they are going to be a horrible roommate. Worst. Decision. Ever.- Corie

You know how I told you I wanted to wait to sleep with you? Well there was a reason.. I had slept with a questionable guy and I may have caught something from him, so I wanted to make sure… Weeellll then I found out you were fucking sleeping around with sluts behind my back when we were in the little "talking/together" stage, so I didn't bother to tell you since I was definitely NOT going to sleep with you. Kind of makes you wish you didn't purposely get me blacked-out drunk, fuck me, then bail on me right? It warms my cold, nonexistent heart thinking of how many whores you've probably infected. Oh, and one more thing… you have a very small dick, and the sex was unbearable. The reason I was so loud was because I was trying to fake an orgasm so you would stop.. and you might want to look into waxing your back.- Anonymous

Remember all those times you thought you were the shit (and chose to treat everyone else like shit) because you're from the Upper East Side of New York and your family "knows" Obama? How about all those times you were trying to party in the room with those hot girls but your sound system "mysteriously" went on and off right before they left the room to party with actual cool kids?th actual cool kids? Remember that? Cuz dumbass…our dorms have breakers that allow us to turn off the power to just the outlets, not the lights. Think about that next time you keep on acting like a douche and keep calling me when you're locked out of the room…- Anonymous

i know you used my beard trimmer to shave your pubes…i don't have black hair. So i pissed on your loofa everytime i showered for 4 months.- Anonymous

I don't like "The Hills" so I delete it from the DVR when it records. I thought you would catch on, but you haven't.- Anonymous

Hey Claire, Remember that one time when we were partying at the sections and you were being a compete bitch to everyone? Like always. Well, I had a hidden agenda when I offered to set up your hookah for you. I asked some random, fat, hadn't showered in two weeks, frat guy pee in the base. Then proceeded to let you and your horizontally inclined friends smoke that shit up. Pina Colada flavor…no more like Pee-na Colada, bitch.- Anonymous

Zack, remember when you blacked out at that party, and when you came too, EMS was trying to find your left ball? Remember how I said it was a large black guy that kicked you? Maybe that kick to your sack will teach you not to hit on and grab my fiance's breasts anymore. Have fun with that ruptured testicle….asshole.- Anonymous

Ok, so Freshman year, my roommate and the guy across the hall (who is now a second year RA, so I won't rat him out) stole all of the shower knobs on our floor in the middle of the night and hid them in the basement laundry room. It was also us that used half a roll of duct tape to attach construction netting across our RA's door on exam day. He had to throw himself against it for a while before it came down.- Anonymous