Every actor owns a pair of Wayfarers. It's a fact (probably). And why wouldn't they? They're the only thing from the old film star stereotype that you can still rock in public without looking like an idiot. Sorry, dudes with ascots and ladies holding those long cigarette holders.
Stoner or Pilot: Aviators
Getting high and operating an aircraft are two very different things, but both require gigantic lenses to prevent anyone from seeing just how awesome or terrifying you think everything is.
Not So Lame That Someone's Mom Couldn't Guilt Them Into Inviting You to Their Bar Mitzvah: Fake Wayfarers
Hey now, you're a rock star, don't fuck anything up at David'sthere's like at least ten more of these that you'll have to go to before you reach the sweet, merciful age of 14.
Athletic: Obnoxious But Practical
Whether it's sprinting after a fly ball during a day game or driving a Lamborghini at night, you're going to need something that's aerodynamic and capable of blocking the light.
Trendy: Obnoxious and impractical
The sun isn't an issue in the club, but these shades are more about looking cool than actual looking. You're all about making a statement, even if it's "I really didn't think this one through at all."
Un: Transition Lenses
You can can go outside without having to change your glasseswhich would be great, if you could ever justify leaving the house.
Alex Watt is on Twitter, Tumblr and an ego trip.