15 Things We Can Learn About Humanity From Google Autocomplete

We struggle with big questions of love and identity in the age of technology and also we think we might have a gluten allergy.


15 Things We Can Learn About Humanity From Google Autocomplete

Our two major priorities in gathering information: romance and fruit ripeness.


15 Things We Can Learn About Humanity From Google Autocomplete

And diabetes. Hmm. Must've eaten too much ripe fruit.


15 Things We Can Learn About Humanity From Google Autocomplete

Americans are fat and ignorant. BUT WE'RE TRYING TO CHANGE, OKAY?


15 Things We Can Learn About Humanity From Google Autocomplete

For less important things like rapping and dating, you don't need to search for the "best" way. "A good way" will do.


15 Things We Can Learn About Humanity From Google Autocomplete

And for cat feeding questions, "an okay way" will be just fine. Cats don't give a fuck. "Hey, I'm going to give cat food to my dog, wait for the dog to poop, and then let the cat do what it wants with the dog's poop. Is this an okay way to feed my cat?" "Yes." -Cats


15 Things We Can Learn About Humanity From Google Autocomplete

I'm not sure what the most badass way to erase a CD is, but I do know that the first step is DEFINITELY to google it.


15 Things We Can Learn About Humanity From Google Autocomplete

As improbable as it may sound, every human has the exact same top three dream jobs.


15 Things We Can Learn About Humanity From Google Autocomplete

We go on the internet a lot when we're bored. Also, bored people never entertain themselves by brushing up on their grammar.


15 Things We Can Learn About Humanity From Google Autocomplete

Here we go, the big questions. THE REAL NITTY GRITTY OF THE HUMAN CONDITION.


15 Things We Can Learn About Humanity From Google Autocomplete

You know how you just assume that when people grow up, they stop asking the stupid, annoying questions they used to ask their parents? Turns out they've just been asking Google instead.


15 Things We Can Learn About Humanity From Google Autocomplete

The worst thing that could happen to us is getting shot OR crying OR falling in love.


15 Things We Can Learn About Humanity From Google Autocomplete

We may be sad and confused and lonely, but at least a lot of us don't sweat that much. So that one goes in the ol' plus column.


15 Things We Can Learn About Humanity From Google Autocomplete

We must remove the harmful social stigma from humping our pillows while fingering ourselves and talking to ourselves about it! Because clearly everyone is doing all those things probably all at once!


15 Things We Can Learn About Humanity From Google Autocomplete

No one ever knows when Jewish holidays are.