The Wilting Flower With the gentle bend of your spine, lay your partner across the vent of your strongest air conditioner and take her from behind. Be sure to twist your head around her frame to achieve a more intimate connection. This way you can both enjoy the cool air, and also avoid getting a mouthful of her gross, sweaty ponytail. For experience lovers looking for an extra thrill, turn off energy saver mode and go full force. The Touchless Crouch Lying prone on the coldest spot on the floor, have your lover contort her legs around you, lowering and raising herself in such a way that you may join your pleasure centers together without touching any of the disgusting, sweat-soaked parts of each other's bodies and getting your gross clammy bodies stuck together. Continue this motion until climax, or you both realize you're not having any fun at all. Sixty-Fine This position is the pinnacle of reciprocal pleasure, made to heighten the connection of lovers by allowing one partner to offer the sexual satisfaction of oral release, while the other partner cools your junk so you can have one second that doesn't feel like you're in a fucking dragon's ass crack. The Cinemystique In the secret, cold privacy of a matinee showing of "After Earth," you and your partner may bask in the sweet solitude of Will Smith's failure by positioning yourselves in a back row, and, with your frames facing the screen, the woman should graffsp the nether regions of the man with one hand, leaving one hand free to hold the giant iced Cherry Coke that doesn't fit in the theater's cup holders. Ecstasy can be achieved through a quick HJ before the creepy movie theater usher comes back. The Summer Rain To achieve this pose, both partners must be willing to engage in the intimate act of letting each other's eyes take in their sunburnt, lumpy curves in the glaring light of the bathroom. Once there, the woman should stand perfectly still under the cool cascade of water, while the man stand weirdly to the side, unable to reach the water, and unsure of whether any actual sex stuff is going to happen. The Unspoken Secret When lovers have reached a level of symbiosis that surpasses the need for words, they can unite in a state of being way too hot for anything, yes, even hand stuff. At such a moment, when this silent agreement has been made, true bliss will be achieved.