By Hallie Cantor
Can you handle pain?
*puts out cigarette on own arm without flinching* NEXT QUESTION. -> next question
I guess, kinda -> NO
Are you ready to explain this tattoo's significance to everyone you meet for the rest of your life?
Definitely, I will never get tired of talking about it. ->next question
Ugh, do you really think everyone will ask about it? -> Yes. → NO
How much do you like jokes about how you can't be buried in a Jewish cemetery?
SO MUCH! -> next q
Not that much ->NO
Is it a stupid tattoo?
I don't know. -> Next q
UHHHH that depends, would you call a badass baby wearing sunglasses "stupid"?→ Yes. → NO
Well, is it in a language you dont speak fluently?
Nah. -> next q
Is it a song lyric or Bible verse?
Lol no -> next q
You don't understand. My Chemical Romance's lyricism SPEAKS to me and always will ->NO
Is it on your lower back or, god forbid, your face?
No! I'm not an idiot! -> next q
...maybe... -> NO
It's not something REALLY stupid like a tribal arm band or dragon wings on your back, is it?
No, I already told you it isn't a stupid tattoo! -> next q
Hahahaha omg what no way definitely not but hypothetically if it were, uh, what would be wrong with that? ->NO
Is it a joint thing with a friend/significant other?
Yes -> next q
No -> skips the next question, goes to "old and saggy"
What if you guys break up?
We won't break up! → BUT WHAT IF YOU DO??? ->NO
Will this tattoo look okay when you get old and saggy?
No, it will look terrible. But so will the rest of me, so who gives a shit? -> Yes
I'll never be old and saggy! -> YES YOU WILL DON'T GET A TATTOO -> NO
Yes: GET THAT TATTOO!
No: Do not get that tattoo.