The special day has come. You've decided you're ready to take the next step in your relationship: divorce. But how do you tell your kids? Remember, this is something they'll remember for the rest of their lives. You have to choose a unique and unforgettable way. After all, hearing about your separation is something they will only experience once in their lifetime.
The classy, old fashioned way. Take your kids out for a nice meal at their favorite restaurant. When it's time to order dessert, tell them they are only allowed to split one desert, and it has to be the chocolate souffle you pre-ordered with your secret message. When they dig in and find your note, they'll be too hyped up on sugar to care that their family is falling apart.
Take your kids on a fun field trip to the beach. Just when they finish building their sand castle, ask them to look up at the plane above them. Soon enough, your announcement will be visible to them -- and if it's a busy beach day, other kids in their class.
A great way to announce your separation is to have something soften the blow. Like, let's say, your child's favorite comic book or strip. Take out an ad in something you know they love to read, informing them their parents are breaking up. Having them hear it from Calvin and Hobbes is much better than you telling them yourself!
This afternoon, when your kids come home from school, have a trail of neatly wrapped chocolates leading them upstairs to your room. In there, have an even bigger pile of candy, which spells out the message "We're getting divorced". Your kids will run straight into your candy-coated message like it's Christmas morning!
The hardest part of breaking the news to your kids is seeing their reaction. Why not avoid that altogether, and have them listen to it when you're not around? Stay up the night before and record a podcast with your spouse, presenting the subject of your divorce. To ease the children into it, mix up a sad song in between your speech. Maybe some Roxette. It must have been love, but it's over now. / It must have been good, but I lost it somehow.
Call in a "Family Game Night". Sit together, break out a game of Hangman, and pick a definition in the realm of "Life Events". Have the kids start guessing letters. Admittedly, it will take a while for them to guess. Obviously, none of them will want to be the one to solve this puzzle. But eventually they'll run out of letters and the truth will come out.
Give out the first clue at home; then send the kids on a tour of the city, gathering more and more clues until they finally reach the place where you and your spouse had your very first date. Mention this fact in the penultimate clue, and lead them to the very last hint. Their prize will be having the chance to contemplate your news on their long way home.
Now that's a tearjerker.