This passenger is convinced that whoever deemed you fit enough to pass your drivers test was a goddamn liar! Every turn you make is a heart palpation, every lane you change is a full body convulsion and no matter what speed you drive at it will always be too fast. Yup... in this person's mind there's noways you're competent on the roads enough to not drive you both off a cliff, regardless of whether you're anywhere near a cliff.
This passenger will blatantly lie to you about being able to eat an entire chicken burrito without spilling it's insides all over your car's interior and you want to be chill so you may choose to naively believe them. Well, believe this instead... Even if you've had a lifetime of good memories together, It only takes a few bites before the burrito and your friendship falls to pieces. Unfortunately you're the designated driver which means you'll have to deal with comforting the slobbering child in the backseat as they move around exerting all kinds of energy. It's almost like an episode of 24; tension is building, you're on edge, running out of time, and at any moment everything could blow......and you're just not emotionally prepared to deal with round 2 of that chicken burrito. This passenger is always ready for a buddy-comedy-type road trip in which they play the funny, charismatic occasional trouble-maker and you play the level headed and often up-tight friend. They start every journey with that unnecessarily excited 'ROOOOOOAAAAAADDDD TRIP!' scream and your wacky misadventures begin! - These range from that one time you both drove two blocks from your house to a Wendy's 'drive-thru' and that other crazy time you both took the long route back home from that same Wendy's 'drive-thru'. If you thought the friend zone was terrible just wait until you get 'driver-zoned'. This person is strictly a passenger and desires no further development in your relationship - choosing to live life by one motto, 'It's not about friendship, It's about the destination #CostEffective.' So find your inner human-pulled rickshaw and giddy-up. This is the passenger who is gracious enough to take on the highest honor of passengers - to take on the responsibilities of the car DJ. They always start pure-hearted with good intentions but then... the taste of power changes them, hungry for more they violently skip through song after song as you and everyone else in the car plead and yell, 'Just let the song play! Let it play!' - It won't do you any good, all you can do is hope and pray they don't have PSY's Hangover.