Freshman year is a great time to get out there and try new things.  Maybe you'll join the Glee Club.  Maybe you'll try and walk onto the baseball team.  What's inevitable though is going out in college.  Whether its a big school or small school, city or rural, these ten situations always present themselves.  And even though you may be to drunk to remember at the time, it's a good idea you know what to expect.

undefined

Because you're flat broke, have a Super Smash Bros. tournament in 30 minutes, and they can't unaccept you, so why are you trying to impress?

 

undefined

It's actually just Blue Moon, but when you put it in a frosted mug, all beer becomes craft beer.

 

undefined

Perfect for when beer isn't kicking in fast enough, and for an excuse to the public safety officer that it's just fruit punch.  Gin has no smell.  Everyone knows that.

 

undefined

Because you're an idiot.

 

undefined

Because you're a huge idiot, who will not remember anything that happens the next 6-10 hours.

 

undefined

Your friend Brian hands it to you in the heat of the moment and you just down it anyway.  You can trust Brian.  You swear it.  Brian wouldn't hurt you.  Brian's Dad is a cop.  This could be anything from cheap vodka and tang, to Pappy Van Winkle bourbon.  But probably cheap vodka and tang.

 

undefined

Sure, pouring sugary juice you drank as a child into your adult beverage may not make you seem as mature as you initially hoped, but at this point you're probably way too drunk to care.

 

undefined

 

Show the girls you're the cool guy who can whip them up something delicious and colorful, and you are IN THERE! Eh, probably not. But either way, it's a good excuse to drink something dumb & fruity that actually tastes good.

 

 

undefined

 

Brian promised you it works and after you saw him mix cough syrup and red bull into the blender, you were kind of shocked when it really did work.

 

 

undefined

 

This should be your first choice.  Hydration is very important for a healthy lifestyle. Just kidding, you have a health seminar in 20 minutes and there's no way you're getting through that shit sober.

 

 

Think of another? Leave a comment!