Did you know coffee is technically a narcotic? It's true! Take a look at the below to see where you fall on the coffee addiction spectrum.

 

undefined

Catchphrase: Don't talk to me until I've had my coffee. (With a polite smile.)

Effect on User: Increased alertness and focus, Slight mood lift, Bowel movement.

Withdrawal Symptoms: Mild Headache, Fatigue.

 

undefined

Catchphrase: Don't talk to me until I've had my coffee. (With a withering glare.)

Effect on User: Able to focus on something as boring as an Excel spreadsheet, Overall jitteriness, Multiple and irregular bowel movements.

Withdrawal Symptoms: Blinding headache, Irritability, Constipation, Nodding off.

 

undefined

Catchphrase: Say a word to me before I've had my coffee, and I swear, I'LL EAT YOUR HEART WHILE IT'S STILL BEATING!

Effect On User: Incredible focus on tedious activities like cleaning and picking one's skin, Nervous tics, Yellow teeth, Paranoia, Explosive diarrhea.

Withdrawal Symptoms: Hallucinations, Vomiting, Extreme constipation.

 

undefined 

Catchphrase: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, JUST INJECT THE COFFEE INTO MY JUGULAR VEIN!

Effect On User: Ability to bend spoons with mind, Unexplainable computer hacking skills, Nose bleeds, Brown teeth, Exploding heart.

Withdrawal Symptoms: Ripping one's skin off, Robbing a Starbucks.