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Sometimes in my Half-Jewish household, my mom will light our old menorah because it's a nice tradition and reminds me of being little at my grandmother's house, but we don't always say the prayers, cause it's not that big of a deal to us. Eh, I guess that's not really that hard to understand. But it's nice.



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Latkes are delicious!!! Though again, it's not really hard for you to understand what this is like, especially if you've eaten latkes before. Just imagine eating that and also a cheeseburger. Not real hard to understand, but, well, whatever, let's move on.



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Alright, I gotta fess up here. I might've been a little presumptuous in the title of the post when I declared you weren't going to understand these things. Because it's really easy for you to imagine what it's like to celebrate one thing then another thing. What person could possibly not even comprehend what this might be like?



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Sigh, only on #4 and I'm really really stretching here. Also that's WAY too specific. And again, even if you don't fit these two exact criteria, it's really not difficult to understand what it would be like.



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I mean, what the hell was I thinking when I claimed people wouldn't UNDERSTAND these things? I literally just told you the thing. If you understand words, you now understand this. It's really really simple.



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Like, if you aren't Half-Jewish, are you really gonna read this list and be like "HUHHH???? WUT IS DATTTT???? I DON'T UNDUWSTANNNDDD!!! I A BIG DUMB ONLY-ONE-RELIGION-PARENT BAYBEEEE!!!!! Does not compute, humanoid. Take me to your leader. I am an alien robot baby who is also dumb." Whatever. This sucks.



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Y'know man, it's just so friggin' hard to write a list these days and get ANYONE to give a shit. Every possible iteration of "things only THESE people understand" has been done like 50 times over, and here I am, desperate for my cut of the pie, trying to scrape together the TINY SHREDS of my ethnic identity to shoehorn myself into this bullshit internet landscape.

 

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And for what? WHATTT? What do I stand to gain from this?? Artistic fulfillment? Some vague sense of shared ethnic pride with faceless numbers because my one parent was one religion and the other was a different one and they fucked?



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Sorry for wasting everyone's time with this. I truly am.



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Haha yeah YOU know it! Please share