So back in the day, Christmas cards used to be weird as shit. I don't mean like, a goofy photo of a half-naked old lady holding up mistletoe and winking at you, weird. I mean, like, here's a drawing of a kid being boiled alive, kind of weird. Christmas cards began back in the 1800s when people basically didn't give a reindeer's ass about kids, and the message for many of them seemed to be "Look at this terrible thing and be glad it's not you -- Merry Christmas!" 

For example...

1. Merry Christmas and may a dapper bully not beat your ass. 

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Source:  civilwartalk

2. Just who you want peering through your window. 

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Source: pintrest

 

3. "A Merry Christmas to You"... now please enjoy this picture of a frog murdering another frog.  

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Source: isitweird

 

4. Nothing says "seasons greetings" like an emu scarying a child. 

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Source: mentalfloss