Dick doodles are not a laughing matter -- only kidding! Of course they're a laughing matter -- albeit an immature one, but still -- which is why Jared Hyam has been using a crude dong drawing as his signature for years.
Jared started using a dick as his signature on various forms of I.D. back when he was a college student and took the opportunity to doodle a dick whenever possible as the years rolled on.
"I thought it would be a laugh; they would approve it and next year I would sign something different," the 33-year-old said.
A dick signature here, a dick signature there, no harm done, right?
If only the government enjoyed dick doodles as much as Jared. The Australian government is now telling Jared that he can't use a dick doodle on his passport or driver's license and Jared is fighting for his dick doodle rights.
"What a signature is comes down to the function, not the actual form," he said. "Generally, it's a person putting a mark on a piece of paper by their own hand. As soon as you start defining what a signature is you run into problems - if it's meant to be someone's name how do we define that because most signatures are just illegible scribble."
Keep fighting that dick doodle fight, Jared. The government sure dicks over people enough and the underdog should be able to give the government a few dicks now and then.