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Jesus Christ, Ryan - WHAT DID YOU DO TO DESERVE THIS?

Listen - we understand heartbreak. When someone dumps you - for your BEST FRIEND, nonetheless - it hurts. It hurts bad. But we're BEGGING you, Teen Girl, not to do this. You've gone too far. Your revenge against Ryan is too brutal and unrelenting for words. Frankly, this is pretty f***ed up. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.

Ryan, we hope dating this girl's best friend was worth it - because your life will NEVER be the same after this.