1. Decimated

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via lovisakalls

2. Hey wait a minute the dentist is being very irresponsible by not keeping his or her records

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via RnRVeritas

3. Honey, I'm Destined to Never Have Kids

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via Ehrichrp

4. Don't get me wrong though, the ink is not far behind

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via spidermane69420

5. Why not both?

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via KevinMaurer2011

6. Where's Grease Withoutherspoon?

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via gre-eee-easy

7. Walked right into that one dude

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via Sleeping_Limbs

8. Deliver us Lord from this evil

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via kkbolito

9. A gentleman's accord

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via LordStorm456

10. Shave it off bubbo

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via PackofMoose

11. Creativity points. Not often do Captchas get shoutouts in roasts

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via georgiaram

12. Angsty autobots, assemble!

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via ballefleche72