1. The lesson here, Jauxerous, is never be kind to anyone

Went to the store to buy a scratcher and cigarettes. Old lady and her grandkid in-front of me in the line. Kid can't decide which candy he wants so the lady tells me to go before them. Kid decides on a candy just as I accepted the kind gesture so I quickly decline and let them take their original spot in the line because i'm not a cunt. She buys same scratch ticket as I was gonna buy. I buy my stuff and as I'm walking out they both start screaming and cheering like crazy. I ask "sup?". Turns out they won $10k.

And no, I didn't win shit on my scratcher.

2. meatsmoker14 you've been what the kids call "jinxed"

I'm 28 and have never been called for jury duty. One day last September this fact was pointed out to me while at work. When I got home, my notice to appear was in the mail.

3. Everyone's hanging out without you, mejok

I got a phone call once from my former college roommate who I hadn't seen in about 2 years. He was in a bar, on vacation and was chatting with another random guy he had never met who was also on vacation. That other guy just happened to be my best friend from high school. They just happened to strike up a conversation because they were both sitting at the bar alone watching the same game and over the course of the conversation both realized they had spent some time in the same state and both knew me. They just called to say "sup".

4. eThnZ05, sounds like it might be time to hang the cleats up

This summer during my baseball game, runner was on third. I swung at a pitch and fouled it right into my foot and it hurt so I dropped to the ground on my back and had my foot up. The ball after it hit my foot went fair and right to the pitcher. My friend at third thought it was a fair ball so started running home. Pitcher threw it hard to the catcher...and hit my foot with that throw...again.

5. Putting the Karate Kid to shame, accio_chocobo

I cut a fly in half, mid-air, with a pair of scissors. It was bugging me so I jokingly snipped at it without looking. I saw two halves drop out of the corner of my eye, and I was like "....oh."

I actually felt awful about it, so I couldn't even fully appreciate the accidental badassery.

6. Whatever this person is the coach of sounds like I need to start going to the practices, W88_001

Not me, but an old coach of mine won the lottery - twice - with both prizes being worth over $100,000...

within a year

7. Witnesses or it didn't happen, Blarfk

I was reading a reddit thread about weird places in the world or something and someone posted a link to a location on google maps using the latitude and longitude coordinates. Just out of dumb curiosity, I replaced them with a bunch of random numbers just to see where in the world I would wind up, figuring I'd probably land in the ocean.

It took me to a spot in my city, less than two blocks away from where I was sitting.

I went from flabbergasted to annoyed that no one else was there to witness it, because it was so astoundingly unlikely and weird, and there's no way I'll ever be able to prove that it happened.

8. Wow that's crazy 1893Chicago - what was the PIN? And also the routing number? And your social security?

Lost my ATM card, went to the bank to have it replaced. Told them what I wanted the PIN to be, and they told me that the PIN would be randomly assigned and mailed separately, and once I received both I could then change the PIN to what I wanted it to be.

The randomly assigned PIN was the one that I wanted.

9. Mine always just get consumed by the sea :(. From sorryleonardo:

I found a pair of sunglasses (unisex sunglasses in perfect condition) on the beach in the water (stepped on it, thought it was a stick, took it out of the water, was pleasantly surprised). A week later I met with some friends. One of them told me she had the same sunglasses but lost them a week ago on a beach. Apparently, they were searching for it for half an hour. I gave it back, got a beer for it.

10. Perhaps the real World of Warcraft was the friends we made along the way, fleeeeetwood

I played World of Warcraft for years, but back when I was just getting started - I'm talking classic WoW - I was running a dungeon with some random people. I was in college at the time and the fire alarm started going off. I told the members in my group about the alarm and that I had to go. I quickly got up and went out for the drill. When I came back, I had a whisper/message from one of the guys that was in my dungeon group. He asked what college I went to, because he also just had a fire drill. Turns out, he lived in my dorm and in the floor above me. We found out because we ended up having a random fire drill while randomly grouped together during a dungeon run. We ended up becoming really good friends and raided together for years.

11. CaptainAwesome-O you have encountered the Angry Birds in real life perhaps you are a pig who has stolen some eggs?

I got shit on by a bird while walking out to the car to meet a woman for lunch. I ran inside and put on a clean shirt, drove to the restaurant, and was shit on by another bird while walking in. I was so flabbergasted that it was difficult to be angry.

12. hokeyWB gimme some of this shit you don't need all of it

I went to a trade show, and a lot of the companies had bowls with "Drop in your business card to win..."

At the end of the day they gathered us all together to draw the prizes... and I won a laptop, an iPhone, a weekend in a resort, a years subscription to MSDN and a carton of wine.

After the first two wins people thought it was funny... then there was playful teasing... but for the last couple I just got booed and people groaned a lot.

A few people called out "Rigged!" etc... but as the announcer explained it was multiple bowls from multiple companies... all brimming with business cards.

Totally freaked me out... felt like the Twilight Zone

13. Eggselent, peter_45000

In the middle of making an omelette I answered the door while holding a whole egg. It turned out to be my new neighbor asking if she could borrow an egg. The look of confusion on her face when I produced one on the spot was only matched by my own, she took it and left without saying a word. It was super weird.

14. Ayyyyy must be the faulty interior wiring! Via nextxoxexit:

the inside of my car burned up on the EXACT DAY a recall came out warning people of faulty interior wiring. It was fully covered.