It's Christmas eve and all through the house not a creature was stirring not even a mouse...

Except, WTF, what's it that you hear? A fat man in red and an unruly white beard!

He's huffing and slamming staight into your home

Demanding cookies and milk or he'll break all your bones!

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via huffingtonpost

Okay, so that's not entirely how it goes, but we have to say Santa Claus is pretty fucking creepy. 

As a kid you're told a robust man shoves his way down your chimney and gives you presents out of a giant sack that could easily fit two or three of your child-sized body in and that's totally fine. 

We're constantly reminded that at any given time, this jovial large stranger is watching us sleeping on a snowy winter night, when all appears to be calm and quiet. But right outside our dark window a red-faced night-stalker peers into the rooms of children to silently deem them naughty or nice and you better pray you're not the former. 

And don't even forget Austria's fun legend of Krampus, you know, the anthropomorphic figure described as "half-goat, half-demon", who snatches misbehaved children during the festive season.

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This is what you get for being a little turd, Jimmy.

So the next time you're wondering why a child is screaming their head off taking pictures with the mall Santa, remember how terrifying it is to be forced to sit on a strange man's lap, while he's dressed in velvety red, and tell him what you really, really want for Christmas this year. 

1. "I am the one who knocks."

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via PapaSLoas

2. 100% sure this child was never seen again. 

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via theghastling

3. A season of merriment. 

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via vintag

4. All he wants for Christmas is ALL of your teeth. 

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via creepysantaphotos

5. Uncle Nick needs his whiskey. 

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via comradebat

6. Leatherface moonlights has Santa Claus during the holidays. 

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via mentalfloss

7. What is behind Santa's eyes?

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via oddstuffmagazine

8. TFW you mistake a homeless man for Old Saint Nick. 

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via pinterest

9. IT PUTS THE LOTION ON THE SKIN!

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via kontraband

10. Santa wants 2 g's of meth this year. 

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via teamjimmyjoe

11. You see, Santa's real face is just underneath this mask. 

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via PapaSLoas

12. Don't stare directly into his eyes...

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via cultofweird