oh no! i saw Lady Doritos trending and was worried Lady Doritos died -- demi adejuyigbe (@electrolemon) February 5, 2018
oh no! i saw Lady Doritos trending and was worried Lady Doritos died
*poking my head out the window* Uh, sorry, you're not allowed to make fun of my car, I bought it... pre-owned *a semi-truck perfectly decapitates me and I awake in Good Joke Heaven* -- Caldwell Tanner (@caldy) February 4, 2018
*poking my head out the window* Uh, sorry, you're not allowed to make fun of my car, I bought it... pre-owned *a semi-truck perfectly decapitates me and I awake in Good Joke Heaven*
When we're all dead & gone, aliens will find us & go "It makes sense that they all died because of their own folly but why is there a car in space?" -- Kumail Nanjiani (@kumailn) February 8, 2018
When we're all dead & gone, aliens will find us & go "It makes sense that they all died because of their own folly but why is there a car in space?"
u know when a straight girl shows u a pic of her bf and u gotta be like "aw :) he's cute" even tho he looks like he smells like hotdog water -- negasonic teenage forehead (@sawyerdotcom) February 7, 2018
u know when a straight girl shows u a pic of her bf and u gotta be like "aw :) he's cute" even tho he looks like he smells like hotdog water
"no, officer, I haven't seen my husband in weeks. yes, I'm terribly worried" pic.twitter.com/Mot2giYC3I -- the library haunter 🦉 (@SketchesbyBoze) February 7, 2018
"no, officer, I haven't seen my husband in weeks. yes, I'm terribly worried" pic.twitter.com/Mot2giYC3I
Woke up this morning to find my dog looking like he just found out about life pic.twitter.com/WA4nyGQaEL -- Gabriella Paiella (@GMPaiella) February 7, 2018
Woke up this morning to find my dog looking like he just found out about life pic.twitter.com/WA4nyGQaEL
The hottest club is 2018.It's got everything:-Kids eating detergent-Chips, but for ladies-Rich guys launching cars into space pic.twitter.com/I49eJjHsyc -- Ana Breton (@missbreton) February 7, 2018
The hottest club is 2018.It's got everything:-Kids eating detergent-Chips, but for ladies-Rich guys launching cars into space pic.twitter.com/I49eJjHsyc
Harry Potter and the Representation I Didn't Actually Bother to Write But Still Want Credit For pic.twitter.com/ggqHL66dqD -- leader of the underdogs (@davidperrons) February 7, 2018
Harry Potter and the Representation I Didn't Actually Bother to Write But Still Want Credit For pic.twitter.com/ggqHL66dqD
I slept with this guy who works at Netflix, which was pretty cool because afterwards he recommended other guys I may also like sleeping with. -- leah knauer (@LeahKnauer) January 29, 2018
I slept with this guy who works at Netflix, which was pretty cool because afterwards he recommended other guys I may also like sleeping with.
is it a sign that you're raising a delicate boy if he's regularly startled by someone finding the Daily Double -- jon klassen (@burstofbeaden) February 8, 2018
is it a sign that you're raising a delicate boy if he's regularly startled by someone finding the Daily Double
Look you can't call it "eating ass" and then get mad when I use teeth -- Hey What's Up It's Eli (@eliyudin) February 3, 2018
Look you can't call it "eating ass" and then get mad when I use teeth
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