1. Get a room you two, not a roof. Via StuckAllOver

I've worked at a hostel for a couple of months. Love the work because there's never a boring day. Sometimes wish it would be a bit drabber at times though.

One of the reasons why the neighbours hate us is that two guests decided to climb up onto the back roof and go at it doggy style. Sure it was midnight, but they were literally in plain view of everyone. Also had plenty of people get it on in the kitchen. Let me assure you that turning on the kettle to mask the noise doesn't work.

2. Well I see you have covered all the bases Catoenailsoup

Here's a few Old Italian man refusing to put on clothes for a 4 solid hours in a 24 mixed from room Had my reception desk smashed to pieces with an iron bar over a £20 room refund. (We have no security) Angry construction working through freshly boiled water at me (luckily it just caught my arm) while I was setting up breakfast. He was angry that he's bathroom hadn't been cleaned. Got in a fist fight with an Irish bloke who I caught smoking in his room 3 guys were doing hard drugs all night in a private room and when they were told by a housekeeper that they had passed the checkout time they chased her through the hostel with a knife. Personally delivered a baby while on the phone to ambos on the street out the front of the hostel in the middle of a drug and alcohol fuelled party.

3. That's just how he says hello RenegadeWild

Staying at a hostel off On Nut in Bangkok last year at this time. Roomed with a giant Aussie that slept with a cleaver. He would pace around the room holding a switch blade and muttering to himself. I left quickly.

4. What is it with these Aussies, jessikatzi?

On night shifts there was a little room behind a linen closet where we could nap on a bunkbed during the shift. One morning I woke up and could hear proper loud snoring.. I walked into the closest and there was this huge Aussie passed out in there who had pulled all the clean sheets from the shelves to make himself a'bed'. I kicked him and he rolled over.. completely naked! Best summer in Amsterdam.

5. If this is the guy that works there I can't imagine what the guests you're getting are like Sloeman

Running a hostel on an island. Guy has a bad acid trip. Usually a great guy who doesn't do hard drugs but now yelling and trying to hit anyone nearby. He's completely uncoordinated though so it's mildly funny until he strips naked and starts scaring people around him. Take him to the beach, hog tie him in the sand, keep watch for hours until his high wears off. Fire him the next day when he's aware enough and had the staff send him off on a separate boat to the guests.

Yeah, he didn't get employee of the month that month.

6. UGH SORRY I WAS JUST LOOKING FOR THE ICE MACHINE. From montyberns

Just got back from Hong Kong recently and was staying at an actually really nice hostel in Kowloon. After the first few nights I noticed that there was a really steady stream of men going in and out of the elevators to a few of the different floors that had pink lights down the halls. But Hong Kong is a busy place with lots of random businesses in buildings, I figured, nothing too strange about that. Until I was riding up one day and peaked my head around the corner of the elevator after one guy got off. I saw a row of doors all with some kind of writing on them and a few with pictures of women... immediately went up stairs and did some research. And that is how I learned about the one room apartment sex industry in Hong Kong. Turns out my hostel was on the top floor of a 9 story building filled with little apartments each containing a sex worker who just hangs out and waits for a client to knock on their door and get some action.

7. 'Weird' feels like an understatement delrio56

The weirdest thing I've encountered is this crazy lady that likes to call around 4am and just breath heavily into the phone. She won't respond, she won't talk, but I hear the breathing. If I hang up, she calls back immediately. This happens about once a week.

8. This is how the fug to party, Jokers247

Couple checks in via expedia for a 1 night stay.
next day get a call from housekeeping that the room is trashed.
go up and check it out.
room is trashed beyond normal trashed.
the bed sheets and carpet have blood on them,
there is hair strewn about the room,
the ties that hold the drapes back had been removed and placed around the posts of the bed,
and there was a large black suitcase left in the room.
i open the suitcase.
inside the suitcase is a:
blindfold,
hand cuffs,
whips,
ball gag,
a very large black double sided dildo,
5 or so dvds of transvestite porn,
strait razors,
and an industrial staple gun.

9. Nothing like a quiet, peaceful night in. From MittlerPfalz

One night towards the end of my night shift I smelled something awful coming from the dorm areas. A guest came out and told me that a Japanese woman in a long nightgown was walking around the halls dribbling diarrhea on the floor. I went to investigate and sure enough, there was the shit all over the floor, leading to a bathroom where the woman had locked herself in. I had no access to cleaning supplies so all I could think to do was throw towels over the diarrhea to try to cover the smell and apologize to the guests until the day crew arrived.

10. Just two bros hanging out, nothing to see here billbapapa

At my university they basically ran a hostel in the summer months - all the dorms that housed the kids fall/winter/spring were empty so to make money they had "Hotel [UNIVERSITY NAME]".

We charged like 25 bucks for a room for a night.

The fucked up thing I remember was two dudes fucking on the pool table in the common area. I don't even think they were drunk, or it was late at night. I guess they had a bet going on the game? I don't know, all I know is someone came to the front and said, "Yeah, there are two dudes doing something inappropriate in the recreational area on the second floor, you should go up there."

So I did, not expecting to see one bent over the table getting railed by his buddy.

I don't think you should have to tell someone not to do that.

11. Who will police the police Axeking12??

We had an soccer event with a bunch of police who stayed for the weekend. They had a room rented just for their liqour which was emptied and refilled multiple times, drunken cops were everywhere having a massive rager disturbing other guests, one of them peed in a potted plant that he was dancing with in the ballroom... I was in the kitchen, so not directly involved but everyone heard all about it. They do this every year and had to stay with us because the other hotels in town had banned them for similar behaviour previous years.

12. This is pure, uncut Dragon Energy blue_wafflez

There's a group of about 20 people or so in this room, and there are these two guys from the UK in the center. They're all on all fours, kinda standing like a monkey would, facing each other. They tied two belts together, end to end, making one giant belt, and they had these belts in a figure-eight around the neck. There was a piece of tape right smack in the middle between both of them. It was essentially tug of war, but with your neck. The person who drags the other person across the line wins.

The kicker of this game? You are completely ass naked. So here I am, wandering into this common room late into the night in Budapest. I've been here all but 15 minutes, and my first bit of sight-seeing, are two tall ass, lanky ass, white guys from the UK, dicks and balls flying about, playing tug of war with their neck. They called it Lizard Wrestling. When I asked, "Why do you guy's call it Lizard Wrestling?" Their immediate response was, "Do Lizards wear clothes?" I mean, they weren't wrong?

We decided to buy quite a few bottles worth of wine, and we're all sharing. Eventually, they're all killed off, and one of the Scottish guys comes up to me and says, "Aye mate, how would you like to be part of the first ever international lizard fight? Team USA vs Team Scotland." Everyone starts chanting "LIZARD FIGHT, LIZARD FIGHT." I'm pretty reluctant, but after a huge swig of wine, I say fuck it, and strip down into my birthday suit. Needless to say, I'm 3-0 in my career. Soon after, the girls get in on it, and it's girls vs girls, guys vs guys, girls, vs guys. Quite the bit of entertainment if you ask me.