It's become a running joke in the world of blockbuster Hollywood filmmaking to talk about the "four Chrises" - Hemsworth, Evans, Pine, and Pratt. They're all straight white handsome dudes who all happen to appear in various series of hugely popular superhero movies. But the truth is that Hollywood's legacy of Chrises goes far beyond these four - the Chris Spectrum is broad and more varied than people give it credit for. And that's why we're ranking Hollywood's top Chrises - to put an end to this misinformed meme once and for all.
10. Christopher Meloni
Sure, when people think of "Hollywood Chrises", they're usually referring to a small group of vaguely-similar-looking white guys who happen to all be in major superhero blockbusters - but there are LOTS of Chrises out there that aren't getting their due. Case in point - Christopher Meloni, a veteran Hollywood Chris for decades. Between his excellent run on Law & Order: SVU as Detective Stabler (who had anger issues from constantly having to lock up C-tier celebrities guest starring as rapists) to his impressive comedic talents put on display in Wet Hot American Summer, we all need to start appreciating this Chris a little more.
9. Christopher Lloyd
Where would we be without THIS classic Chris? His performances in the Back to the Future series and Who Framed Roger Rabbit? are nothing short of iconic, although his output in the last 20 years or so has not been all that great. Still, turning in character work like Doc Brown gets you enough Chris Points to earn you a spot on this list for the rest of your life.
8. Christopher Walken
Speaking of iconic Chrises, it's hard to get much more iconic than Christopher Walken - an actor so weird and unique that literally everyone you meet WILL do an impression of him at some point in their lives. And on top of having an idiosyncratic way of speaking, he's a stellar, award-winning actor, a talented dancer and singer, and one of the most legendary SNL hosts around. Really, he only loses points because he PROBABLY knows what happened to Natalie Wood the night of her death (since he, Robert Wagner, and the boat's captain were the only other ones on that boat) and has refused to divulge the truth after all these years. Definitely loses Chris Points for that.
UPDATE: Christopher Walken's actual name is RONALD Walken. He is a FALSE CHRIS. The WORST KIND OF CHRIS. SHAMEFUL! We regret including him in this list, and will never speak of him again.
7. Chris Pratt
Chris Pratt seems like a great guy - a loving father, a good friend, and an overall friendly, well-meaning guy. He's also handsome, jacked, and an extraordinarily talented comedic actor to boot (not only from Parks & Rec - he's genuinely AMAZING on The O.C.), but we're STILL mad about what his character did in Infinity War, so he loses MAJOR Chris Points for that.
6. Chris Pine
Chris Pine is the only of the Core Four Chrises with the humility to accept a non-lead role in a superhero film, which is something I respect. He chose to be the love interest and not the main star of the film, and he did a great job at it. Plus, he's done some fine work in the rebooted Star Trek series, even if the actual films themselves were a little lacking. Plus, he sounds like he would smell pretty nice.
5. Chris Rock
Chris Rock has never been much of an actor, which is a bummer because he's one of the greatest stand-up comedians to ever exist. So good that he's in the top five based on his on-stage comedic chops alone - whereas in films, he's usually playing second fiddle in lesser Adam Sandler movies. Many forget this Chris when compiling their own personal list of favorite Chrises in Hollywood, but they would be remiss to diss this Chris.
4. Chris Hemsworth
You know who got AWESOME over the past two years or so? Chris Hemsworth - who, as Thor, was always SERVICEABLE in Marvel Cinematic Universe films, but never all that compelling or interesting. Somehow, that all changed in Thor: Ragnarok, when director Taika Waititi realized Chris Hemsworth is genuinely hilarious, and played into that HARD. The result was not only the funniest Thor's ever been, but also the most badass. And that was helped a lot by the genuine charm Hemsworth - a jacked, friendly Australian dad - brought to the screen. He's like a golden retriever - it's impossible NOT to like the positive energy emanating from him.
3. Chris Cooper
Great body? Check.
Incredibly talented character actor who completely disappears into every role? DOUBLE-check.
Okay, so MAYBE a few might disagree with those first two checks. Those people are WRONG. Not every Top Tier Chris needs to be a TRADITIONALLY handsome, jacked superhero man. Chris Cooper has the face of a character actor - in other words, he's not all that pretty to look at to most, but damn is he great at acting. From Adaptation to American Beauty to October Sky, when you see Chris Cooper appear onscreen, you KNOW you're in for a quality performance from a gifted actor. Honestly, Marvel would be missing out bigtime if they didn't cast him as the next Wolverine whenever they get X-Men back. Sure, he would be less jacked, less handsome, and much older than Hugh Jackman, but he's CHRIS GODDAMN COOPER*.
* - to everyone who disagrees with me, please leave a comment below and I will try to convince you that hiring 66 year old actor Chris Cooper as Wolverine would kick ass.
2. Chris Evans
Chris Evans' genuine decency and heart somehow turned Captain America - a distant relic in the world of comic books that everyone laughed off as way past his prime - into one of the most beloved characters in modern film. With anyone other than Chris Evans in the role, I can't imagine the character would be 1/10th as popular as he is today. This Chris has got it all - acting chops, handsome face, good teeth, the ability to grow a stellar beard, and a genuine love of dogs.
But he is not the top Chris. No, that honor goes to another...
1. Christopher Lee
How great is Christopher Lee? He's so great that he's the only dead Chris included on this list of best Chrises in Hollywood. His own death is only a MINOR point against him, because his legend is immortal. He was the only person on the set of Lord of the Rings who had personally met and conversed with JRR Tolkien, he released MULTIPLE heavy metal albums (even into his 90s!), he was a Nazi hunter after World War II, and he had lived long enough that he was present at the last public execution by guillotine in France. His career spanned longer than most actors ever live, and included iconic roles from Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, James Bond, and more. He was the best Chris to ever Chris.