Have you ever seen a parking job so bad, so INSULTING to mankind, that you wish you could take a giant dump on the windshield as a "fuck you" to whoever did it? 
We've all seen those people, the ones with a giant jeep parked sideways in a handicap parking space (no they don't have a handicap parking tag), or some sports car that screams "my peenie is little so my car is expensive!" taking up three spots in front of the Walmart.

These people suck and if there were a mighty God of parking, we'd hope they'd smite these douchebaggettes to the very pits of Hades where the only parking spots available are up their own buttholes.

1. Someone got so mad at this car that was parked half in handicapped parking and half in a no parking zone that someone went full "Carrie" and emptied a jar of jam on it (rightfully so).

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via TadyZ

2. This is for compact cars, not compact dicks, my friend.

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via spsheridan

3. Ah yes, perfect. I will take up two spots AND block the road! I AM GOD, I CONTROL THE TRAFFIC WITH MY OBNOXIOUS RV!

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via gsmitty2525

4. If you're so worried about someone dinging your shitty Mustang, then why don't you just PARK IN THE EMPTY BACK SPACES YOU FUCKING TURD?

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via lama579

5. It seems like the shopping cart return is the PERFECT size to squeeze my entitled ass into. 

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via doppz1

6. Hm, it has two lines on either side so it must be a parking lot. Strange that it's right in the middle of an intersection though. Oh well! *slams car door and walks away whistling* 

parking fails: crosswalk parking

via corgs_n_borgs

7. All of this is way too on the nose that it must be some sort of satirical art statement piece. 

parking fails: trump monster truck quadruple parked

via thebayallday

8. This is why you should bring chalk with you everywhere. That way, you can call out jizz stains in a fun, colorful manner!

parking fails: asshole parking job

via twentytwowords

9. Taking up two compact car spaces means you get lots of notes from admirers! 

parking fails: double parked fanmail

via datawrestler

10. Hey, he clearly put it on his license plate that he did indeed do that, so at least, if anything, he's honest. 

parking fails: no parking zone

via Jon_Publique

11. I'm a MOTORCYCLE so I'm allowed to do this. 

parking fails: bike parking fail

via KeyLimeUmbrella

12. Park on the sidewalk and you'll anger the carts. You don't want to know what happens when you anger the carts. 

parking fails: not even a spot

via Wildmen03

13. Let this be a lesson to all those who think they can defy the Gods of Parking and get away with it. 

parking fails: revenge

via EvilExotics