Billy- Uncle George, can I ask you something?
W-Sure Bill, I’m not even busy at all. With anything.
Billy– Thanks. You see, I’ve been dating this girl for a while, and I don’t think it’s working out.
W– Hmm, why do you say that?
Billy– Well, when I started dating her, I thought she would… I thought she would sleep with me. But it turns out I was wrong. Well, I guess I thought there was a chance she might sleep with me. In retrospect there was a lot of evidence to the contrary that I overlooked.
Billy- I should have realized that she wouldn’t do it.
Billy- Even worse, since I’ve been dating her, these other girls have popped up who I know would sleep with me. Some of these girl’s whole lives revolve around the possibility of them sleeping with me. I’ve heard that some of them are planning on doing it right now. But I can’t go after them because I’m stuck with this one.
W- Hmm. So you can’t go after those other girls because you’re so busy with this one, but they’re the ones who you really should have gone after in the first place.
Billy- Yeah, and on top of that, dating her is getting really expensive. I’m practically broke now. And I have way more important things to spend my money on… way more important.
W- Hmmm, so what you’re saying is that you are in this huge mess right now because you started dating the wrong girl based on faulty information, and now there are lots of other girls out there that you can and should pursue, for your own good, but you’re unable to due to the fact that you’re stuck in a hellish and senseless relationship with one that you have no business being with in the first place? And the longer you stay in the relationship the worse you make everything?
Billy- That pretty much sums it up Uncle George. What would you do if you were in my shoes in almost this exact situation, or one that served as a sort of thinly veiled metaphor for it?
W- I’d break up with her. Definitely
Billy- Thanks Uncle George, you’re not an embarrassment at all.
(Billy walks out of the oval office. From an intercom that sits at the President’s desk comes a woman’s voice)
Intercom- President Bush, today’s US soldier death figures just came in. It looks like a bunch more people are dead.
W- That’s fine Gladys. That’s just fine.
(President Bush picks up a newspaper to look at the comics when, suddenly, a switch turns in his head. His eyes narrow, then widen, andfor a brief moment, the stars allign, and the mysteries of the universe reveal themselves to him in an illuminous flash. He has an epifany, and he now knows what he must do)
W- My God, it's all so clear
Intercom- Yes Mr. president.
W- I'd like a cherry coke