Adam Ruins Everything
Jake and Amir
The Morning After "Lost"-- Never Trust an Eye Patch
March 8, 2007
It’s Spring Break! Time to take of your shirt, enter a wet tee-shirt contest and let your fruity cocktail in a souvenir mug give you the guts you need to hook up with that hot stranger. Sure, by day three you’ll realize that you can’t avoid running into that random whose saliva you shared at every all-you-can drink tiki bar. Forget about tomorrow, this is your time to make mistakes you’ll tell your grandchildren about—provided you live through spring break and are able to procreate after all the alcohol you’ve just consumed. So take a break from French kissing, and check in with your old friend “Lost”, hey—they’re on a tropical island too, and I bet you’d be down for hooking up with most of these castaways.
What went down this week:
Hurley and Sawyer enter a battle of ping pong at the island which is really just a nice distraction from Sawyer’s lovesickness over his “girlfriend” Kate. Although Sawyer loses the match to Hurley, he still gets his Playboys back, also a nice distraction from Kate. Meanwhile, Sayid, Kate, Locke and Rousseau, discover a high tech farm on route to finding Jack and Rousseau’s daughter. Upon entering the “farm” unarmed, Sayid gets shot by an evil man with an eye patch. While snooping around, he finds a map to where Jack is, just as that woman from the dock in the hippie garb/turban comes back to attack. Kate punches the hippie woman in the face, then hippie woman convinces Eye patch to kill her. She dies, and Rousseau, Sayid, Kate, Locke and Eye patch (who is now Sayid’s prisoner) head off to find Jack with the help of the map. Just as they leave the high tech farm blows up because Locke pushed yet another code on a computer while no one was looking. They head off to find Jack and Rousseau’s daughter knowing that Locke has just destroyed their chances for communication with the outside world by accidentally blowing up that farm. A cute cat is left behind to survive in the wild.
Here’s what we learn:
Kate is not as street smart as she thinks. She immediately trusted the story of a man with both a strange accent and an eye patch. Is she not familiar with the pirate community? Has she never seen a James Bond movie?
From this point forward, Locke should not be allowed anywhere near a computer. He’s turned the sky purple with his computer antics, he became a prisoner to the Hatch and now he just blew up their only chance for outside communication by pushing “77” after a low-tech chess match. Locke the type of person who would accidentally CC the husband of the woman he’s having an affair with on an e-mail to her. Come on Locke! You missed the entire fight against hippie turban woman, because you was entangled in a game of computer chess!
Sayid is capable of things we didn’t think possible. He’s the closest thing Lost has to Jack Bauer. Yeah, I said it.Not only is he a very convincing liar, but he can spot a lie very quickly. (When someone only has one eye to look you in the eye with however, it does provide a bit of an advantage).
They’ve set up an interesting power dynamic between Sayid and Rousseau. While Sayid is definitely the leader, Rousseau doesn’t always agree with him, and her stellar survival skills definitely give her leverage. I foresee a battle coming between them, or at the least a shift of power, or hopefully a dirty island kiss.
Overall, this episode laid the ground work for the ultimate impending rescue of Jack, (provided he wants to be rescued) and established that no one is getting off the island anytime soon. It also set up for a romantic homecoming between Kate and Sawyer, and worked on the developing more significant character of Hurley, which adds some fun to this tangled tale.
Last but not least…thank you Lost! The Lost creators have acknowledged their negligence in introducing us to the hot couple: the brunette man who Sawyer referred to as “Zorro” and that blonde girl who wears the short shorts and sometimes goes on missions. My favorite moment was when Sawyer looked at that guy and said, “Who are you?” Thank you Sawyer, we were all thinking it. I wonder if we’re being introduced to these two because they’re preparing us for some others to die, and want us to be familiar with the new characters first to ease the transition. Like getting a puppy when your old dog is starting to get sick…what do you think?
The Morning After
We like you. Do you like us too?
Don't ask me again.