(Gates answers door)
GeekSquad Representative: Hi, I'm Alex from GeekSquad. (looking at clipboard) So, you need help installing Windows Vista?
Bill Gates: Yes, that's right. I'm having trouble
A: Wait, holy shit, are you Bill Gates?
BG: Yes. As I was saying, I
A: Haha, you've got to be joking.
BG: I assure you, this is no joke. Now if you would please just
A:Why would you need help?? Didn't you, like, create Vista?
BG: Look, I'm mostly on the management end of things now. I haven't actually written software in years. I just needyou tohelp me with
A: Haha, this is great. So you're really not that smart after all, are you? I can't wait to
BG: (quietly) Please, I
A: tell the guys at the office that
(Gates grabs him violently by the collar, slams him against the wall)
BG: Listen, you little shitburger. I'm a busy man, and I don't have time for this. Now if you don't shut the fuck up and fix this right now, and I mean right-god-damn-now, I will fucking end you. Do you hear me? I'll make you and your whole worthless family disappear. You know I can do it.
A: (crying) Jesus Christ, dude! Alright!
(Gates drags him by the ear to the computer)
BG: Now pay attention, pudwhacker. I put in the installation CD, and it's giving me this error message.
(Alex sobs, looks at screen)
A: Um, sir, you need to start with disk 1. It says it right on the screen
(silence, Gates glowers at him)
A: Here (he puts in the right disk, starts the installation)
BG: I should have you erased, you insolent twat. You're lucky I'm in a good mood.
(Gates releases him, throws a wad of $100 bills at his feet)
BG: Now get the fuck out of my sight.
(Alex picks up the money and starts to leave)
BG: Oh, and Alex? If you tell anyone about this (makes slow throat-slitting gesture)