ARI'S WORLD

I have to admit last week's episode had me worried. I was worried that in the off season, the writers of Entourage had been accidentally exposed to large amounts of Estrogen and 80s ballads.
I was worried that they had all gotten in touch with their sensitive side and had lost the ability to make Ari Gold the complete and total dickhead that we all love and that makes Entourage what it is. Tonight, I am worried no more.

You see, after going all Indiana Jones through a gay club to save Lloyd last week and crying at a screen saver pic of him and Vince last night, Ari finally realized he had a problem. He realized that he had gone softer then Lloyd with a woman. He realized that he needed help.

He turns to his shrink (while she's on her day off, of course, because office hours are for pussies) and after he tells her about not being able to fire a semi blind recently divorced douche, she tells him some mumbo jumbo about him evolving and becoming a better person or some crap. Suddenly I started to freak out. Was this HBO's way of telling us they're changing Ari? Please don't be true. But as usual, Ari comes up in the clutch… telling her exactly what was on all of our minds… "I don't want to change. I like the old me."

And suddenly, old Ari was back…

In vintage whirlwind form, Ari strolls into the office, joyfully knocks over the mail cart with out apology, finds the semi blind recently divorced douche and fires him in a conference room full of people while smiling and dancing, ignores Babs, and then grabs a Snickers right out of the hands of a fat girl with a quick "Skip it Jenny."

Yes, Ari Gold is back.

VINCE AND THE BOYS

Vince and E have a serious problem dealing with Amanda. Around her, they have about as much backbone as a piece of sushi. They get absolutely blasted by her in her office and they leave whimpering like a couple of school boys. If Ari had yelled at them, they would have told him to fuck off and gone drinking for the day. Instead, they fold like a lawn chair and promise to decide about the Sam Mendez movie by day's end.

After reading the script, they guys realize how this little relationship triangle works… Vince liked the Mendez script because Amanda did and he is frightened and turned on by her, E liked the script because Vince did and he's frightened and turned on by him.

Seriously… Now that they have Ari back on track, they god damn better fix E's character. After his bitch fest last week, he buckled to Amanda yelling at him twice this week and basically admitted that he lied about what he thought about a script to please Vince. What exactly does he do? Answer the phone? If all he's going to do is say yes ma'am and give Vince his own opinions back, then he's a complete useless douchebag. He even asked Turtle and Drama who collectively read at the 4th grade level to read the script. Why? Because right now he barely has an opinion. It's like that old saying, opinions are like assholes, everyone except E's got one.

I was pissed at how weak Vince and the boys had been for the whole episode. I felt like my boys had let me down. They were being pushed around like an old person on roller skates. (I don't know why old people would be on roller skates, but they'd be pretty damn easy to push around.) But just as I was gonna lose it, Vince's cell rings and we are reminded why we love him. Simply put, Vince has game. Basically here's how the call goes… "Vince, it's Amanda. You want to fuck?" Vince – "Uh… yeah. I would like to Fuck."
Amanda – "Ok. See you in twenty." God damn it would be nice if life really worked like that.



A few random thoughts…


-Why didn't we get to see the sex scene HBO? I pay damn good money every month for my AC. (adult content)

-If Drama's on a tv show currently, how come he's never shooting? I bet it's canned after 1 episode. The writers can't lose Drama being self delusional, it's too funny.

-Ari and Vince finally seem like they're about 2 episodes from being back together.
-E seems like he's 2 episodes away from a coma.

-There haven't been many girls this season. Can we please get a few gratuitous groupie closet sex scenes? Is that too much to ask?

-I wouldn't go to a Bobcats game either. Long live Ari the Dickhead.