As a child a schoolmate asked
why my speech was not so clear
His mouth had moved and his words projected
but, ASSHOLE, I cannot hear.

Oh, how terrible they were to me
they'd abuse me all day long
They'd tie me down and call me names
and lip-synch shitty songs

My life was hell, I must say so
but if I did you'd probably laugh
You pricks would ask, "Who stars in Scrubs?"
because its funny when I say Zach Braff

A gym class whistle, an atomic bomb
to me they sound the same
When I ride my bike I can't hear shit
and get hit while in passing lanes

I long to hear a rooster
or the noise from a car's ignition
but my fingers tire, so I'll stop typing
and finish with Speech recognition

Derrrp deehh denny deeeddy
daaddddddem enda enda ooh
reaaah reeeeeh roommmey
raahdeeppy deeepy roooooon

Deaaaamy daaab bedddy
reaaaaaamy roooop aah doop
benddda blennna beeenda bent
daa dooop dee dooppp de doop