Brian Mckinght hosts a late night radio talk show and gives advice to those in need.

Brian Mcknight: Hello all you beautiful people out there.And welcome to my late night love talk show, Smooth Talking, hosted by me the R&B singer Brian Mcknight.I'm here to help you, now let's take a caller. Hello caller what's your name and how can Brian Mckinght help you?

Caller: Ah, hello Mr. Mcknight, my name's Chris and ya see I just met this really great girl and I would really like to start something with her. However, I lack a little in the romance department and I'm not really surehow to go about it all.

BMK: You're in luck Chris, I have a foolproof, step-by-step guide to help you win this girl.

Chris: Wow, awesome.

BMK: Okay 1: She's like a dream come true.

Chris: What? Did I not hear you correctly? That's not really a step unless you mean to Find a girl that's like a dream come true. Is that what you mean?

BMK: 2: Just wanna be with her.

Chris: Again not really sure what you mean. Am I supposed to tell her that?

BMK: 3: It's plain to see that she's the only girl for you.

Chris: Seriously, none of these are steps. Plus how could you possible even know she's the girl for me?

BMK: 4: Repeats Steps 1-3

Chris: Those weren't steps how am I supposed to repeat them? This really isn't helping. Even if I did repeat all those "steps", that seems alittle excessive. Also, they all seem really cocky and arragante. I don'treally want to give that kind of vibe off, let alone do it twice.

BMK: 5: Make her fall in love with you.

Chris: Okay, now there's a step, finally. That's a pretty vague though. How should I make her fall in love with me? That's like the whole reason I am calling.

BMK: This is a little added bonus. If ever you should feel your work is done, then start back at one.

Chris: That's it? That's all your advice?

BMK: Sure is, works for me every time.

Chris: Well this was a huge waste of time.Thanks for nothing you mother f-

BMK: Aww seems we've lost you Chris. Good Luck wooing your girl. We are going to take a quick break to hear from our sponsors.

With the coming election looming on the horizon, one question will be on everyone's mind: What will George Bush do without any sanctioned vacation time?After all, it's not really a game of golf at the ranch unless your ignoring the muffled cries of a nation.

"I'm not used to vacationing on my own time", President Bush said in an interview on Wednesday, "only America's"

A vacation every few months, or even every few weeks is what we've come to love about our president.His vacations are about as inevitable as Bristol Palin "accidentally" falling down a flight of stairs.And don't just think these vacations are for fun, either.It's much easier to veto a bill if you're 4,000 miles from Washington, so if anything, it's more practical.

But, the problem remains that after the new president is inaugurated, President Bush will no longer be able to vacation on our time.This fact alone is upsetting Americans and illegal, goddamned sons of...I'm sorry...immigrants all over the country.

"I looked forward to the president's little excursions," said Thomas Shoemaker, of Connecticut, "I've almost grown used to an absence in the White House."

"Que?", said stereotypical Mexican Jose Gonzales, of Nevada.

There had even been talks of a new bill allowing the soon former president to take vacation time from normal Americans.That's right.Pretty soon you may have Secret Service at your door, ripping your Disney World park hoppers from your crying, six year old daughter.Grow a pair, bitch.It's okay, he'll be sure to send you copies of his pictures on Splash Mountain, or hugging that liberal commie bastard Mickey Mouse.It's "still in the works" according to the administration, but you can bet the President will pass that shit faster than the Patriot Act.

In related news, Barack Obama recently took a weeks vacation from the campaign trail to rest and spend time with his family, and republican hopeful John McCain hasn't taken a vacation since Atlantic City first opened its boardwalk in 1870.