CollegeHumor: Santa Clara Stuff http://www.collegehumor.com http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1901056 At the end of this day, one shall stand, one shall fall... Tue, 17 Feb 2009 18:30:29 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1901056 At the end of this day, one shall stand, one shall fall... nonadult comedy <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1901056"><img src="http://0.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/8/e/collegehumor.0678000837bcc6ad19c8944e6ad537a2.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1401476">WA</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 0 likes so far. <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1901056">Be the first!</a> </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1770677 Back From Abroad Thu, 12 Feb 2009 13:20:47 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1770677 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

  • =Guy Who Studied Abroad In Rome

    • =Guy Who Studied Abroad In Barcelona

    • =Guy Who Studied Abroad In London

    • =Guy Who Studied Abroad In Amsterdam

    • =Guy Who Didn't Study Abroad


    • Hey guys, good to finally have the whole crew back together, huh? How was abroad?

    • It was pretty awesome man, saw a lot of sights, really felt like I experienced the world.

    • Yea man, plus classes were a joke and we partied our faces off.

    • Seriously, so much fun. Girls were super easy too.

    • Oh man, yea...it was...fun and stuff.

    • Cool, cool, well it was kinda quiet here but we made do. What do you guys feel like doin now? Wanna beer?

    • Ooh, Keystone? Gross. I only drink beers that come in green bottles. You got any Stella?

    • Uhh, no, just this, sorry man.

    • Got any vino?

    • The fuck...?

    • Wine. Do you have any wine? Red, preferably.

    • I'll take a shot of Absinthe.

    • Got any edibles?

    • What the hell is wrong with you guys? No, I don't have any...any fucking vino. Or absinthe. Or any goddamn edibles. If you don't want this beer then I'll just drink it myself.

    • Jeez, sorry man. Here, I'll take one, just sorta plug my nose here...

    • So you guys hungry? I'm starving. Pizza good?

    • Yea sure, is there anywhere around here that serves prosciutto and melon and has a brick oven? I had the best pizza this one time in Capri...

    • No I was thinking Pizza Hut or something simple like that...

    • Yea man, get, like, 4 XL's. I'm pretty hungry...

    • You have seriously fried your brains. Don't procreate. So is Pizza Hut good with you guys?

    • They have any small appetizers?

    • That would taste delicious to me right now.

    • I refuse to eat that shit. Count me out.

    • You guys are impossible. Forget it, I'll have some chips or something.

    • Crisps, you mean.

    • What? Honestly, just go fuck yourself.

    • Just sayin is all...

    • Anyways, what do you guys feel like doin tonight? There's a party across the street around 10, maybe go to the bars after that?

    • 10? Um, I was thinking we pregame til like 1:30 and then head out after that.

    • Let's go to a club. I really feel like dancing to techno.

    • I second that.

    • Any good cartoons on?

    • Pregame til 1:30? The bars stop serving drinks at 1:45, how is that a good idea at all?

    • My Barcelona friends and I would stay out til 5 most nights...

    • Then go hang out with them, douche. And dancing? Seriously? I was fine with the v-neck t-shirts, spiked hair, and peacoats, but this Eurotrash shit has got to stop.

    • What Eurotrash shit? This is how I am now man.

    • Oh really? You're from fucking Minnesota. Are you gonna be wearing skin tight jeans in December? And you, you're from goddamn Oakland. How are you gonna go giggin with that scarf on? Real hyphy man.

    • You don't have to be such a dick about it...

    • Yea, seriously, just because we experienced some culture and changed because of it.

    • Culture? Your parents essentially paid for you to go on vacation in Europe for a few months while you pass it off as school. You got drunk every night and pissed on historic monuments. Then you take a weekend trip to another country and you feel like you were immersed in the culture. Call it sour grapes, but at least I'm keepin it real.

    • So what we got to travel on our parents' buck? It was a good time, we saw a bunch of sights...

    • Eat good food...

    • Party with people from all over the world...

    • ...and on the third one, I want half peppers and half pepperoni, just cuz I wanna see how they interact...

    • You're just jealous because we had such a better time than you. What was so great about being here?

    • (thinks for a minute) Rock Band?

    • Ooh, he's got us there.

    • Damn, didn't see that one coming. Fair enough, you're right.

    • Shotgun drums!

    View Article
    ]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/9/collegehumor.632ae6ce2194da1d069b53d991c38c72.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355">Steve Horvath</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 3 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />     http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1887968 Can you find both of Tails' tails? Mon, 03 Nov 2008 02:03:12 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1887968 Can you find both of Tails' tails? nonadult comedy <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1887968"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/8/collegehumor.827569ba977ef729048ae75878e5e736.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1637906">Stephen McCarthy</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1 like </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1830625 It's that damn Hansel Wed, 17 Sep 2008 23:39:57 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1830625 It's that damn Hansel nonadult comedy <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1830625"><img src="http://0.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/d/f/collegehumor.cc79ae8d844eefd5dd88cc1fda8d8dc6.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1637906">Stephen McCarthy</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1 like </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1830348 That guy's behind Tue, 16 Sep 2008 01:05:46 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1830348 That guy's behind nonadult comedy <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1830348"><img src="http://0.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/3/1/collegehumor.1f6e11b3a5d77d6e736507e14a26b290.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1637906">Stephen McCarthy</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 0 likes so far. <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1830348">Be the first!</a> </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1830345 That guy Tue, 16 Sep 2008 00:57:43 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1830345 That guy nonadult comedy That guy <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1830345"><img src="http://8.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/f/1/collegehumor.fbefc9ffcf96903891383c2121eefb7f.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1637906">Stephen McCarthy</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 0 likes so far. <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1830345">Be the first!</a> </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1824975 Well Hangman Wed, 30 Jul 2008 22:51:08 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1824975 Well Hangman nonadult comedy <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1824975"><img src="http://0.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/1/collegehumor.08f9f5aa091bc53bb23286610a186984.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1555675">Hayseed</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 0 likes so far. <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1824975">Be the first!</a> </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1756341 Things Only Slightly Less Scary Than Kimbo Slice Mon, 02 Jun 2008 14:59:26 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1756341 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
  • A chainsaw-wielding grizzly bear
    The lovechild of Zeus and Mr. T
  • Watching your grandparents bone
  • Getting your fingernails ripped off one by one
  • Dad after four beers
  • Vigo the Carpathian
  • Kimbo Slice's turds
  • Erectile dysfunction

    • View Article
    ]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/9/collegehumor.632ae6ce2194da1d069b53d991c38c72.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355">Steve Horvath</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 3 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />     http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1755422 Things I Learned My First Day Working at a Biochemical Company Sun, 18 May 2008 01:10:22 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1755422 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> ¢ People from Louisiana are next to impossible to understand on the phone.

    ¢ Never contact a company in French Canada.

    ¢ Spilling chemicals on yourself does not give you superpowers.

    ¢ The boss's secretary is off-limits.

    ¢ The boss's personal assistant is off-limits.

    ¢ The boss's daughter is off-limits.

    ¢ Drinking chemicals does not give you superpowers.

    ¢ When a boss tells you to do something, do not push it onto those who work beneath you.

    ¢ The people who work in production do not actually work beneath you.

    ¢ You cannot hire homeless people to work beneath you.

    ¢ Bathing in a vat of brightly colored chemicals does not give you superpowers.

    ¢ The alcohol produced at a biochemical company is not the same kind you drink, but it still gets you fucked up.

    ¢ Forklifts can drive through some walls.

    ¢ Forklifts cannot drive through every wall.

    ¢ Being electrocuted while touching chemicals may actually give you superpowers.

    ¢ Setting fires with your mind is frowned upon.

    View Article
    ]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1401476"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/f/b/collegehumor.69cf5afff5439fd5a61ca0cb017ed6f0.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1401476">WA</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 0 likes so far. <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1755422">Be the first!</a> </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />     http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1814517 That Girl... Sun, 04 May 2008 23:37:16 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1814517 That Girl... nonadult comedy <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1814517"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/5/7/collegehumor.6802a8f5daf7f29ec24efd1732d07da2.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1392420">Sean Danzeiser</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1 like </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1810604 Keystone Light Tribute Beer Pong Table Tue, 08 Apr 2008 14:30:32 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1810604 Keystone Light Tribute Beer Pong Table nonadult comedy This table is built of over 300 cans and and boxes. The playing surface is a football field. The stadium half has realistic stadium seating with cans as fans, a press box, billboards with the inserts, as well as a entrance at midfield made of can pictures. The lights are made out of cans with a bulb in the middle of a can. <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1810604"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/f/e/collegehumor.dfd5e0bff914c82cd4c268aed0f53295.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1582490">Tyler</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1 like </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1807582 Maybe Jesus was really into Tommy. Sat, 22 Mar 2008 19:14:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1807582 Maybe Jesus was really into Tommy. nonadult comedy Maybe Jesus was really into Tommy. textbook, jesus, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1807582"><img src="http://2.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/5/3/collegehumor.736983b5f8b0d04d80e83d83c22f75d8.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1389947">MT</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 49 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1747507 Bro, Not Even, I Got A Boo Wed, 02 Jan 2008 15:19:39 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1747507 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> In response to yesterday's Dude, Don't Even Bother, Cause I Got The Star

    Oh you think you're hot sh*t now that you got the star, huh? Well you better watch out, because I'm taking it like those gangbangers took your sister's virginity. In yo' face!

    All that careful planning, waiting to use it until just the right time...it's all for nought brother! You might as well turn the game off now because me and my stolen star are gonna light you up like your convicted felon father did to all those files at his office. What now?!

    I know what you're thinking, you're hoping on getting a Boo yourself. Well let me alleviate you of any dwindling hope you still have, because just like Christmas you won't be getting anything you asked for. Tip the bandleader and fluff up the pillows, because this dance is done my friend.

    Keep Reading
    ]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/9/collegehumor.632ae6ce2194da1d069b53d991c38c72.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-01-02 15:19:39 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355">Steve Horvath</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 36 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />     http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1745707 Famous LOLCats Tue, 04 Dec 2007 17:52:42 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1745707 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

    Keep Reading
    ]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/9/collegehumor.632ae6ce2194da1d069b53d991c38c72.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-12-04 17:52:42 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355">Steve Horvath</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 63 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />     http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1742357 Point-Counterpoint: Who's A Puppy? Fri, 12 Oct 2007 03:43:14 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1742357 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> [upload:2352752:small:left:Point - Who's a puppy?]POINT - Who's a puppy? Is it you? Is it? Hmm? Is hims a puppy? I think you are! Yes you are! Yes! Who's mommy's sweet little angel? A-boo-boo-doo-boo-doo-boo!

    Yes! Ohh come here snookums and give mommy a big kiss! Oh, hims just wuvs giving mommy kisses, doesn't hims? You do, don't you! I think you do! Ooh-boo-doo-boo-boo-boo!

    Keep Reading
    ]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/9/collegehumor.632ae6ce2194da1d069b53d991c38c72.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-10-12 03:43:14 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355">Steve Horvath</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 10 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />     http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1738499 Differences Between "The Real World" and The Real World Tue, 14 Aug 2007 12:29:59 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1738499 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

    This is the true story... :: God, I haven't had any time to read lately, let alone non-fiction
    ...of seven strangers... :: I don't think I even have 7 numbers in my phonebook
    ...picked to live in a house... : I need to move out of my parents' basement
    ...work together... :: How does one classify "Dressing up in a Chicken Costume and handing out Coupons" on a tax return form?
    ...and have their lives taped... :: Scotch tape! That's what I need to pick up next time I'm at the drug store
    ...to find out what happens when people stop being polite, and start getting real. ::
    Maybe I should just stop being polite. I heard somewhere that girls are into dickheads. I'll try it out if I ever meet another girl

    View Article
    ]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/9/collegehumor.632ae6ce2194da1d069b53d991c38c72.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-08-14 12:29:59 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355">Steve Horvath</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 2 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />     http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1737631 How Is That A Strike?! Thu, 02 Aug 2007 13:26:26 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1737631 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> That ball was almost in the dirt! Are you blind, ump?!

    I mean, seriously, how is that a strike?! It was nowhere near the plate! Zambrano's thrown that pitch at least 5 times for a ball all game, and now you're gonna call this a strike? Call it both ways, blue![upload:2038984:small:right:You suck, blue!]

    I swear, these umps are fixing games just so the Cubs can't win another World Series. I mean, did you just see that pitch?! It was so low and inside I'm surprised it didn't hit him! He should be ejected!

    Hey, blue! Toss him! At least give him a warning, ya pussy!

    Oh sh*t, I think he heard me. Quick, duck! Did he turn back? Is he gone? Ok, good, I knew that pussy wouldn't do anything. He knows better than to mess with a Cubs fan. I've been pounding Old Styles all game, I'd probably end up paralyzing him or something.

    But anyways, back to that pitch. Is this guy serious? Did he just get called up from the minor leagues of umpires? He's a joke, I could call a better game than him. For instance, that last pitch would've been a ball in my book. And that pitch last inning that Theriot checked his swing on and they called a strike? Remember that one? When I hurled a string of expletives and kicked the seat in front of us? Yea, that would've been a ball as well.

    God, maybe I should just become an umpire. That would solve so many problems. I wonder if they'd let me be one even though I'm such a hard core Cubs fan. I should probably leave that off my application. Tell them I don't like baseball at all, I just need a job to support my family. No, that's stupid, they wouldn't buy it...

    Ok, here comes the replay of that pitch, just watch. Watch it almost hit him. See, right when he swings his bat he moves his front foot to avoid the pitch. Honestly, how is that strike?

    View Article
    ]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/9/collegehumor.632ae6ce2194da1d069b53d991c38c72.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-08-02 13:26:26 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355">Steve Horvath</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 2 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />     http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1734993 Rejected Titles For "Live Free or Die Hard" Wed, 27 Jun 2007 16:22:02 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1734993 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
  • Live Free and/or Die Hard
  • Snakes on a McClane
  • Die Hard with a Vengeancer
  • Live Free or John McClane Will F*cking Kill You
  • Yippee-Ki-Yay Mother F*cker: The Movie
    • View Article
    ]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/9/collegehumor.632ae6ce2194da1d069b53d991c38c72.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-06-27 16:22:02 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355">Steve Horvath</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1 like </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />     http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1732980 Differences Between Grand Theft Auto and the Real World Tue, 05 Jun 2007 01:55:13 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1732980 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>


    Changing clothes erases wanted level Changing clothes in Wal-Mart parking lot has increased wanted level in Dayton, OH
    Cars are always readily available "Mom, seriously, f*ck, I'm 20 years old, I should be able to drive to the movies whenever I want!"
    Prostitutes replenish health Prostitutes deplete bank account and self esteem
    "Hot Coffee" mode allows my character to have sex
    		 Hot coffee allows me to have a bowel movement in the morning
    Only have to pay hospital $100 every time you die Family must pay hospital $10,000 for allowing Grandma to die there
    Getting shot takes away 7 health points Actually takes away 23 health points
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    ]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/9/collegehumor.632ae6ce2194da1d069b53d991c38c72.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355">Steve Horvath</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 56 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />     http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1732358 Please, Have Some Consideration Tue, 29 May 2007 18:45:20 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1732358 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Yea!  Summer's here man!  No more school for a few months!  PARTAYYYY!

    If you've felt this way recently, I have two words for you: fuck you.

    "How can such a handsome man have so much hostility?" you might ask.  The answer, my friends, is because my school is on the quarter system, meaning I begin school about three weeks later than everybody else and finish almost a month and half later. 

    So please, if you are fortunate to be on summer vacation, have some consideration for your friends who are still in school next time you decide to call them at 3 in the morning yelling indecipherably into the phone about some sweet beer pong shot.  I didn't wake you up back in early September when I was still at home, did I?  Ok, except for that one time, but it was a double bounce!  Double!  That's three cups!  But I digress...

    Also, do you think you guys might wanna leave some jobs for the rest of us?  While all the rest of you have successful summer internships I am left to scour Craigslist for a part time job that doesn't require overalls.

    So again, if you know someone who is still in school, try not to pester them with trivial late night phone calls.  Instead, how about you visit them?  I mean, if you are going to prevent your friend from his studies, might as well be there with him to knock back a few.  And if you are on the quarter system and still in school, may God have mercy on your soul.

    Thanks, and I'll see you guys in like two and a half weeks.

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    ]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/9/collegehumor.632ae6ce2194da1d069b53d991c38c72.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-05-29 18:45:20 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:355">Steve Horvath</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:602"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1 like </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />