Miami

The realities of life after college

When I graduated 2 and a half years ago I was SO sick of homework, SO sick of tests, SO sick of college and SO ready for the real world. Or SO I thought. Little did I know that college was like a 4 year house party. I had a constant buzz, I...

Badly Drawn Comics #1

Things That Piss Me Off: Apple

The new Mac OS X came out a couple of days ago. I knew because the main color of Apple's website changed from white to black, which means a total makeover was in order. It sure looked like it, I mean, the graphic of a big, glossy black X coming...

Where the Hood Rats... at?

Dmx once said:  Where the hood, Where the hood, Where the hood at?   But don't worry, he has friends that fuck dudes... like him.   Well Barkeep, I have no idea where that was going but I like to ask one more question... Where the hood, Where...

Funny Drunk Phone Numbers

You know when you're out and get that random phone number placed in your cellphone and try to be smart and name them so that you remember. Well everyone has them and here are some of mine that make me laugh.  I mean before I get drunk and call...

Worst Movie Ever - Volume 1

Simply Irrestible   So I woke up this morning still drunk from the night before, smoked a cigarette, finished my now luke warm beverage (which was more water than alcohol since the ice melted) and couldn't find the remote.  Actually, I didn't even...

The Penis Game

Ok we are not talking about the normal penis game.  Haha, yeah everyone knows it...   whoever yells penis the loudest wins.  Congrats sir, but welcome to the new and improved perversivion sweeping the nation. Hey, call me gay... it doesn't matter...

My Favorite Word

Lo and behold the greatest word ever spoken...   Genitalia.  

Questions That Don't Have Answers

1.  Does the "Neverending Story" ever end? 2.  "The Land Before Time" is before the Big Bang? 3.  Could "The Brave Little Toaster" toast a 'hero?' 4. Just how many licks does it take Mr. Owl? 5.  In Oceans 13 who has the bigger cock... George...

Ode to Porn

Oh porn, thou savior of the Internet,Thy worthiness be knownThou giv'st us all the love we craveIn the comfort of our homes.Thy diversity unparalleled,Innovation unmatched,No fetish goes unsatisfied,From straight sex to Rugrats.Thy prices, too,...

Things That Piss Me Off: Nightclubs

I still can't get the logic of going to nightclubs all the time. It's like people are saying, let's pay an obscene amount of money to listen to obscenely loud music, but obscenely priced drinks to get obscenely drunk, then leave, hopefully with a...

I Love Coldplay (Idiot Revision)

COLDPLAY SUCKS LOL COLDPLAY SUCKS LOL COLDPLAY SUCKS LOL COLDPLAY SUCKS LOL COLDPLAY SUCKS LOL COLDPLAY SUCKS LOL COLDPLAY SUCKS LOL COLDPLAY SUCKS LOL COLDPLAY SUCKS LOL COLDPLAY SUCKS LOL COLDPLAY SUCKS LOL COLDPLAY SUCKS LOL COLDPLAY SUCKS LOL...

I Love Coldplay

I love Coldplay. I know I said that in the title, but the truth bears repeating. I love Coldplay. I want to have Chris Martin's babies. I want to fellate Jon Buckland. I want to marry each and every one of those musical geniuses. There is no band...