How to Properly Use a Vuvuzela During St. Patrick's Day
    Microwave Demands Child
    Baby: the other, other white meat.
    "WHAT? Wheelchairs are super expensive."
    Okay. Now cough.
    "He's got brown hair. Freckly. Likes Hot Pockets."
    The girl who wrote this was 17 in 2001.
    Never too early for inheritance monopoly.
    "And for my sixth course I'd like to eat the child."
    In Japan this is like the Statue of Liberty.

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