Adam Ruins Everything
Jake and Amir
We'll call him Rip Van Whiskers.
These new LaserJets really do print in high resolution.
That lizard always was a wiseass.
Mom put out bread for the little birds. She also, indirectly, put out little birds for someone else.
"You got squirrl'd"
"Deer hunting in Wisconsin."
"So, we had this recipe where you sit a chicken on a stand..."
"My roommates found a deer on the side of the road and they decided to skin it and cut the meat up on our beer pong table." Uhhhhhh okay.
"Maybe not the best location for a pet store."
"Awwww... another cute mouse"
"My roommate and I were cooking supper when we heard a loud crash like a baseball hit our window. We went to investigate and found this on our living room window. Stupid pigeon!"
"Someone thought it would be funny to put a dead raccoon on this kid's doorstep for mischeif night. We thought it would be even funnier to tie it to his door because he was away for the weekend!"
"My roomate killed this creature with a steak knife in our kitchen, so we figured we'd hang it outside our front door as a warning to the rest of them. We don't need no sitnking bats."
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We like you. Do you like us too?
Don't ask me again.