"Donald Trump" Picture

Donald Trump is a business magnate, television personality, and put-er of name on stuff. Despite never having held public office, people get excited when he threatens to throw his hat in the ring, combs his hair forward to his definition of perfection, and hints that he’s going to run for president, a thrilling prospect for many of our nation’s stupidest citizens. A friend of Sarah Palin, Michele Bachmann, Omarosa Manigualt-Stallworth, and other crazy ladies that are too old for him to marry, The Donald fired-up the American public by demanding to see Barack Obama’s long-form birth certificate, then saying a bunch of other crazy things when the president presented it. In the 2012 election, he sought to moderate his own GOP debate but was forced to cancel when almost none of the candidates would agree to attend and also because electing the head of the most powerful nation in the world is serious business and not shitty reality TV.