Jake and Amir
WTF is going on
Idiots on Facebook
The Graphic Truth
"Some guy robbed the liquor store in second level of the strip mall. A police standoff followed, then he locked himself in and set it on fire (he showed those cops). The store burned down but the sign survived." Mmmmm... toasty!
The ole' free haircut trick.
Okay, you guys, this joke has gone far enough! There were no aliens! They didn't give me an anal probe and they can't control my mind!
"Eh, there's probably nobody inside."
I'm sorry officer, I didn't realize the roof was on fire. Yes sir, I'll have it looked at immediately.
"No one had any matches, so he decided to take a log from the campfire to light his pipe."
He's either insane or oblivious.
St. Elmo's Fire
I'm in a rush, I'm just going to do them all at once tonight.
Oh it's okay, mine don't smell.
He looks so bored for someone with fire coming out of an orifice.
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Don't ask me again.