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Bacon Fixes Everything
"Oh, beer. Is there anything you can't fix?"
"See? I wrote on it that it's broken. That's exactly the same as fixing it."
If you can get past the obtrusive extension cord and the potential danger, it's really not that terrible of a ceiling fan!
"Jesus Craig, even a goddamn monkey could fix the server. How stupid are you? I honestly want to know."
"Trust me dude, I once did this with a cracked chair in college."
You don't want to drink too much "FIX" in this house.
We like you. Do you like us too?
Don't ask me again.