If this doesn't invoke a fear and wrath of God in you, nothing will.
Once you anger the God of Wisconsin, He renounces your faith for you, Favre.
The decal on Dave Coulier's car.
God: Adam, might I speak with thou for a moment? Adam: Yes my Lord? God: It seems that fruit is missing from my tree. Adam: Indeed my Lord! Eve tasted from the tree earlier this morning! God: …
Can God sell a rock so big He can't pick it up?
His only weakness? Also kryptonite.
Jesus: Hey Dad. Can we talk?God: Yeah, what's up kid?Jesus: So I was talking to some of my buddies a couple days ago and I told them that you were my dad and they all laughed at me. I was wonderi …
He sees everything.
GOD: You're all set to go, My Son. You are My Greatest Creation, blessed by the sacrifice of Jesus and made in My own image. I've given You the great gift of music. Use it well.MICHAEL: Aw, …
"I'm in a Mythology course and found this depiction of the Fertility Goddess Matronae."
Featuring weights so large, even I can't lift them!
I think that dude's been watching me shower.
It's full of rocks so big, not even he can lift them.
Never date a girl with unrealistically high standards.
You think god would get himself off the DL sooner.
I don't know if I'm going. Last time He only got one keg and everyone was gone by midnight.
"God! Dammit! Stop leaning!"
On the 8th day, god created Salvation Army t-shirts.
"Dear Timmy, You're welcome."