They're like cuddly stuffed animals. Filled with rabies.
May or may not cause severe rash all over your entire body.
Unfortunately the photographer's standing 5 feet away.
The last one excretes a fully baked pumpkin pie.
You'll know because mountains on the Coors cans turn from white to red.
The circumcision would have gone a lot faster if he didn't insist on using the toothpick.
We're pretty sure he was permanently injured before.
This is exactly why I don't talk to my mom.
He's got a miniature helmet for the other head.
The perfect morning drink after a nice, long Mountain Dew shower.
Relax, it's just called that because he murders the neighborhood cats with it.
You're going to need some serious drugs to numb that pain. It's a vicious cycle.
Next step: Installing a tub in the sofa.
This is exactly why no one goes to talk to the professor during office hours.
The only other way to get this much high-fructose corn syrup from a boob is to breastfeed from Rosie O'Donnell.
They better accept "barely used" as a reason for return.
This adds a whole new meaning to "baby got back."
You just can't get good service anymore.
Being a chocoholic is no joke.
Don't be offended, it's because their personalities are so captivating.
Dad was pissed. He must not like chocolate.
Either that or he's giving some kid a ride on his shoulders. Neither of which we're comfortable with.
Pumpkin seeds are the least of your worries.