Joe Biden

The most powerful man from Scranton, Pennsylvania - sorry, Michael Scott - Joe Biden is the current Vice President of the United States and a big fucking deal. Before settling for a vice presidency after two failed presidential campaigns of his own, Barack Obama’s white-haired man was a Senator from Delaware for thirty-six years--making him the fifteenth-longest serving senator in American history. As a senator, he was named Chairman of the Senate Committee on the Judiciary, Chairman of the International Narcotics Control Caucus, and Chairman of the Senate Committee on Foreign Relations, so yeah, his resume is pretty legit. Even though Biden never successfully made the Oval Office his own, his frequent gaffes and slips of the tongue have drawn many a comparison between his public speaking skills and Former President Gerald Ford’s ability to walk down a staircase. [[[readmore]]] *Opposite Appeal:* If Joe Biden ever seems like too much of a fuck-up-goof, good! A little known political fact is that he was explicitly hired to be the exact opposite of Dick Cheney. Does he seem like an evil villain with a plan? Nope! Does he seem like he has any thoughts about the words that are about to come out of his mouth? Nope! Does he seem like he’s plotting to take over the word, so he can cackle over the charred, lifeless bodies of lesser men? No way! Success. *Secret Life:* Since the mid-1970’s, Joe Biden has toured and performed as an easy-going beach bum minstrel under the name “Jimmy Buffett.”

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