You can't argue with science.
Don't blink. Or sneeze.
I feel like a brand new boy.
Reading between the lines is so lame.
Some Australian socks, looking for a friend!
But OMG it got so many likes.
Sex dolls do not count in the mile high club.
So hot right now.
Just being a good, capitalist samaritan.
And I wouldn't have gotten away with it too, if it hadn't been for your meddling hope and change!
The new George Washington collector's stamp.
Ughhhh society has such ridiculous norms. It's like, okay one minute you want me to have flawless skin and the next I need to have two left eyes? You know, I don't have to take this. But, man, two lef …
Anti-pervert but not anti-perspirant.
C'est la doobie.
Hey, I am POSITIVE you said your name was either "Nas" or "Mexico".
The subway is that dirtiest place that plunger has ever been.
How embarrassing! They forget to put an 'e' at the end of ho!
At least give us a courtesy flush?
Awww... He's so adorable when he murders pedestrians.
"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. -Wayne Gretzky - Michael Scott" - Vin Diesel
How often do you pay close attention to what is goin' inside that illuminated square box we all like to watch? Maybe you should OPEN YOUR EYES, man, and actually read some of the tings they're putting …
Game of Thrones: The Abridged Version.