mitt romney

Willard “Mitt” Romney--that’s right, Willard--is a former Governor of Massachusetts, current guy with great hair, and the presumptive GOP nominee for President this election season. The son of former Governor of Michigan, George W. Romney, Mitt was born in Detroit and had the good sense to get out before that city turned into a post-apocalyptic wasteland. He is a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, which is an extremely wordy way of saying he is Mormon. Romney’s Mormonism is a cause of concern among comedy writers and comedy fans alike. Just think how many Mormon jokes we would all have to listen to if he were elected. Terrifying. Romney was the co-founder of private equity investment firm Bain Capital (YAWN) and is also apparently a political Etch-a-Sketch, which must make him a straight shooter, since curved lines are so goddamn hard to draw on those things.[[[readmore]]] *Haircut:* The Clark Kent *Greying Temples:* Oh, you fucking KNOW it. *Massachusetts?:* Already home to the best looking president - John F. Kennedy - Massachusetts would have a very high batting average if Romney wins. If only that little troll John Adams weren’t dragging the average down...

Binder Full of Bitches
Meat Loaf Musically Endorsing Mitt Romney
Politicians Touching Lives (in Awkward, Physical Ways)
Bob Schieffer Photobomb
Creepy Josh Romney Returns with a Vengeance
Mitt and Ann Get Frisky
These Things Could Make or Break a Presidential Campaign
What Should Politicians Be For Halloween?
Newly Negotiated Presidential Debate Rules
10 Ways to Make the Presidential Debates More Exciting
Romney Obama Wife Hair Swap You've Been Waiting For
Josh Romney: Soon
Mitt Romney Won't Release His Spotify Playlist
Mitt Romney's Binder Full of Women
Mitt/Ann Romney Face Swap
Romney Inspires the Children

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