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This just in: It's important to stay up to date on current events. Without the news, most of us would be uninformed on breaking stories and other noteworthy information, like which anchor or reporter dropped an "f-bomb" on live television.

    According to Newspaper, Boy Shits Buck
    Neil Armstrong: First Man on the "Man"
    Awaiting Obama's Arrival in Me
    Mom Punishes Pot Smoking Son by Making Him Wear Sign
    News Reporter Flips Out
    Fox Identifies Michael Jordan as "Failed Baseball Player"
    Rhino Fart Ruins Newscast
    Al Roker Frozen on Today Show
    Demon Takes Over TV to Warn You of Severe Weather
    "More Volunteers Needed to Help Rape Victims"
    Street-Walker Wedding
    Writer Asks You to Close Your Eyes While You Read
    Reporter Melts Down During Heatwave
    London Olympics Take Place in London

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