"News" Video (Page 8)

The president was unreachable for comment, as he is currently in a monster-proof bunker one mile beneath the Earth's crust.

"Wow, that is embarrassing. We of course meant to play the diarrhea scene from Van Wilder."

So the circumstances of this video aren't funny, but this kid is awesome.

With a little discipline, these kids will go from Steve to Stefan in no time.

"Now let's send it back to the studio for a man getting kicked in the groin."

It turned out that the guy who could punch harder was right about tariff reform.

I hope something terrible happens to her and she has to become the "dishpan hands" model.

It's not what you think. Someone spelled "boobies" on a calculator.

"Sorry, I was just checking to see what time it was--I mean my hand fell asleep--I mean I thought my producer wanted to play rock-paper-scissors. I'm fired, right?"

"Are you 1? Are you 2? Are you human?"

I guess they don't sell Twix bars in Canada.

"In other news, I've lost my will to live."

It's like someone ran him through a bedazzler.

Being afraid of clowns is silly, it's the cool old ladies on toilets you have to look out for.

He's too fabulous for TV.

"Tastes like chicken-flavored beard shampoo."

This just in... get it?

And the thug who pulled his finger gets off scot-free. What a world we live in.

They shouldn't have put off the assignment until the night before.

"Please jump in after it, please jump in after it, please jump in after it." -the bears