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		<title>CollegeHumor: Nicholas Cage</title>
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			<link>http://www.collegehumor.com/article/6820282/nic-cage-looks-for-a-new-assistant</link>
			<title>Nic Cage Looks for a New Assistant</title>
			<pubDate>Tue, 04 Sep 2012 13:56:11 -0400</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[<p><em>Recent reports reveal that America&#039;s heart throb <a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2196820/Nicolas-Cage-fails-return-DVD-rentals-clocks-230-late-charges.html" target="_blank">Nic Cage owes his local video rental store $224.48</a> in late fees. Rather than take the blame like a normal human being, Cage blamed his assistant for the misunderstanding. Needless to say, Nic is looking for a new assistant and we just spotted the post on Craigslist.</em></p>

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			<title>Nicholas Cage Addresses Rumor that he is an Immortal Vampire</title>
			<pubDate>Fri, 10 Feb 2012 14:47:15 -0500</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[Of course, &quot;I'm not a vampire&quot; is exactly what a vampire would say.]]></description>
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			<title>Nic Cage Arrest</title>
			<pubDate>Mon, 18 Apr 2011 12:15:37 -0400</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[My hair is a bird, your arrest is invalid.]]></description>
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			<title>Nicholas Cage Goes Nuts for 4 Minutes</title>
			<pubDate>Wed, 24 Nov 2010 10:34:46 -0500</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA["I'D LIKE TO THANK GOD, THE ACADEMY, AND EVERYONE ELSE WHO FREAKIN' GOT ME HERE."]]></description>
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			<title>Nicolas Cage's Secret Passion</title>
			<pubDate>Wed, 21 Jul 2010 12:52:54 -0400</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[Weird, because in The Rock he said he was a Beatlemaniac.]]></description>
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			<link>http://www.collegehumor.com/article/5566929/nick-cage-and-his-agent</link>
			<title>Nick Cage and His Agent</title>
			<pubDate>Thu, 27 Aug 2009 15:23:56 -0400</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[<table style="width: 480px; height: 521px;" border="1">	<tbody>		<tr>			<td> <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Phonecall:</span></span></td>			<td> <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Result:</span></span></td>		</tr>		<tr>			<td>			<p>			<b>Cage:</b> Nick Cage&#039;s phone. This is Nick Cage.			</p>			<p>			<b>Cage&#039;s Agent:</b> Nick, baby, I got a movie offer for you on my desk.<br  />...]]></description>
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			<link>http://www.collegehumor.com/video/3964204/wicker-man-fifth-symphony</link>
			<title>Wicker Man Fifth Symphony</title>
			<pubDate>Thu, 02 Apr 2009 11:45:30 -0400</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[They say Beethoven went deaf so he wouldn't have to listen to this movie.]]></description>
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			<title>"Wicker Man" Scenes Out of Context</title>
			<pubDate>Mon, 03 Dec 2007 11:57:48 -0500</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[In his latest role, Nicholas Cage inexplicably assaults old women and taunts children. He also steals a bike.]]></description>
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