I think I missed a big part of the story last time I watched this.
It's a terrible fan, but a great disco ball.
Here's a what the Google Voice voice mail actually said: "Hey Mike. It's Mom. Send me a text to let me know if you and Megan are coming out to dinner so I can go out to the store. Let me know. Bye …
"Sales of ostrich toys are down. Figure something out!"
Jesus was at the supermarket
Note: this argument usually doesn't work.
In other news, birds have taken over the city.
Sometimes a picture captures that perfect moment between fun and pain, dry and wet, safety and disaster. This gallery celebrates that in-between stage, just moments before disaster strikes.
A perfect dismount.
Ever since early humans figured out how to start their own fires, mankind has longed to take that fire and put it on other things to see if those other things would also catch on fire. "Whoa did you s …
I've been waitressing since before I was born.
Sound the dumbass alarm, because here comes the king. Let me explain: I just had a super long/busy day at work (Internet was slow, printer was broken, blah blah blah), so I had not eaten all day. So …
Wheeeeeee oh OH NO! OHHHHHHH!
Someone is bad at either geography or sewing.
Hey guys, I know I'm late but I made it!
Not the fairy tale romance I had in mind.
This is going to be quite a shock to Kwame.
It's gonna be a cold ride.
It's gonna be a long day.
Roadworkers scrambled to clean it up.
It's sweet, screws up your teeth, and you don't want your kids to have too much. Sounds like candy to me.