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			<title>Tortoise on Spinning Record</title>
			<pubDate>Wed, 09 May 2012 12:00:00 -0400</pubDate>
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			<pubDate>Fri, 18 Mar 2011 14:00:34 -0400</pubDate>
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			<title>Man Stuffs Record Amount of Quarters in his Belly Button</title>
			<pubDate>Mon, 03 Jan 2011 13:00:57 -0500</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA["And to celebrate, I will be spending these record-breaking quarters at the Chick-fil-A down the block."]]></description>
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			<title>Also, the first person to beat labyrinth while wearing Adidas shorts</title>
			<pubDate>Mon, 08 Feb 2010 15:06:21 -0500</pubDate>
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			<pubDate>Wed, 18 Nov 2009 11:32:23 -0500</pubDate>
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			<title>Eat your heart out, Pete Townshend</title>
			<pubDate>Wed, 28 Oct 2009 13:56:33 -0400</pubDate>
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			<pubDate>Thu, 06 Aug 2009 09:02:26 -0400</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[The longest word]]></description>
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			<pubDate>Sat, 13 Jun 2009 23:26:35 -0400</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[I forced other people to through a harsh enslavement]]></description>
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			<description><![CDATA[I don't want MY kids near the Stone Crab Molester. That's for sure.]]></description>
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			<pubDate>Sat, 17 Jan 2009 16:25:10 -0500</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[The link actually sends you to Bin Laden's Friendster account.]]></description>
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			<pubDate>Thu, 23 Oct 2008 12:59:47 -0400</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA["No, no it's not what you think!"]]></description>
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			<pubDate>Wed, 23 May 2007 11:52:34 -0400</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[Look how small that black disc is. It's gotta be a record.]]></description>
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			<pubDate>Tue, 24 Apr 2007 13:30:22 -0400</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[Yo momma's so short, she recently set the Guinness World Record for shortest mother.]]></description>
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			<pubDate>Thu, 01 Mar 2007 13:37:27 -0500</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[If you could only see him from the waist up, it would look like he was just freaking out.]]></description>
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			<pubDate>Fri, 16 Feb 2007 09:57:57 -0500</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[1203 strokes in one minute. Let the hilarious comments begin!]]></description>
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			<pubDate>Tue, 03 Oct 2006 11:46:34 -0400</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[Layer up, its cold outside.]]></description>
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