Adam Ruins Everything
Jake and Amir
Try explaining the, "Santa's not coming" sign to your kids.
Rudolph with your nose so bright, I need you to start game 1.
What's so scary about a large bearded man who breaks into your house to eat cookies?
Santa Claus probably gets so much pussy.
Hope you're not getting in the sleigh after this.
You're never too big for Mall Santa.
Here comes Santa Claus here comes Santa Claus.
"That's not a stocking hes packing."
"I made the globe much like a mylar ballon is constructed - with two flat discs glued at the edges. The entry point in the bottom is a 'tube' made of thinner clear vinyl. The tube seals around my waist and holes in the tube keep the globe inflated. The
Don't worry, Blitzen's driving.
Santa doesn't look so good. No worry, he still has 9 months to get everything together.
Go Santa! Go Santa!
Then hoe come he didn't smoke any of the stuff I left out for him?
Making toys all year, checking that damn list twice, hurrying around the globe Christmas eve - it's all a big pain in the ass. But it's nights like tonight that make it all worth it.
Nothing says "Chirstmas!" like the tears of children.
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We like you. Do you like us too?
Don't ask me again.